Tuesday, July 17, 2012

TOMAS' THEORY ABOUT THE RUSSIAN, OLIGARCH VAMPIRE

Tomas says Grigori just came here for fun. He thinks we're like his 'Vegas.' Probably gonna chew up some shrill, young, cafe society cuties..... total a few Porches ...... buy (or steal) some souvenirs and then go home. They say he keeps a low profile in Europe, contributes to all the right demagogues, attends evening services at Saint Basil's, kills only the most pathetic, disconnected street urchins. Vampires learn  how to fit in, you know.


Annie says she wishes he was her pediatrician. I don't even wanna know that that signifies . Guess her people took her to a doctor.... on a regular basis, I mean. That might be a good sign. Maybe her truncated human existence wasn't so bad? She don't talk about going home to California so much since 'The Volga Wonder' showed up. But you know how she is. She'll go back to it. Conrad says she's a rotten, little shit, who should have given him some time to lose a few pounds and do some push-ups before she 'changed' him, 'cause now he gonna be stuck with 'man- boobs' til the cows come home. But she don't care.... Look what she's stuck with. Can't even ride the shooty-chutes on Steel Pier, 'cause she ain't fifty two inches tall yet...and she NEVER will be. Baylah says she'll take her sometime in the winter, real late at night. She (through her boyfriend) knows everybody in Atlantic City. They'll give her a ride...... 


Tomas wants Papa to go out and look for 'the Russian.' But Papa don't answer. Just sits there playing with a little, black, plastic 'Magic Eight Ball' fortune telling thingie. Man, the bastid who invented that HAD to be a genius. What's it got, like two or three parts and that's it? Bet Martha Stewart could make one in like five minutes.


Tomas wanna go out by hisself. Sarah says not to, 'cause it's too dangerous. He can usually 'feel' other vampires, but Grigori is different. Ain't no vampire can feel him. Witches picks up little, bitty things, but  they can't  really tell if it him, or just hives.


They did call Doctor Franklin. Ask him to see if the Great Armonica 'knows' something. He say it do know a little. He think the Russian wanna catch up wit' that Johnny Jump Up and take him back to Borscht-land. Only Doctor Franklin do not say Borscht-land. He call it 'Muscovy' like they did back in the day.... HIS day.


Do you remember who Johnny Jump Up is? I think they got somethin' on Google, if you punch in his name and the name a this here blog-opera. Think he got hisself premature buried, or somethin'. He like them monkeys what chews off faces. Only he ain't no monkey. But neither was the last guy what done that too...


Wonder how Tarzan keep Cheetah so calm? Never hear a him rippin' off no eye-lids or nothin'.


I think monkeys does that 'cause they doan wanna wear no pants. You know, ev'ry time you sees them they dressed up like Ed Begley Sr. from Twelve Angry Men, or somethin'. You know, like a grandpop, with pleated pants, a white shirt and suspenders and all. They must hate that crap, 'cause God never made 'em do it in the jungle.


Wanna know what the Russian bastid is doin' right now? He flyin'. He swoopin' down outta black, night sky (but only on them little, dark, narrow streets)..... Then he grab all-by-themself, scared, lonely folk under they arms, hoist 'em up like two hundred feet in a the sky . They kickin'. They screamin'. But he squeeze they neck real hard, so they don't scream too much. Then he say 'bye-bye' and jus' let go. Like to watch 'em go splat. So far he done three a them.


Damn.... How you think the government gonna deal wit' that shit when the sun come up?


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