Monday, October 1, 2012

TEENAGE MUTANT KILLER TURTLES

This is wilkravitz. none of the disembodied spirits are around. Think they're at a dead folks party in Atlantic City. Nucky Johnson gives 'em. His name ain't Thompson. That's only fiction for TV. I told  you how the ninth floor of the Ritz Condominiums is crazy with ghosts, because that's where the real life Steve Busemi (forgive spelling) held court. None of the people who live there now mind much. It only adds to the luster of the place. And every once in a while they find mysterious, vaguely 1920-ish, shadows permanently tattooed on the walls. Nothing gets 'em out. Gotta paper right over 'em.

Mister Never-You-Mind is there. Them's his kinda people. But I do not know where Zebulon and Johannan actually are. I don't care. My neck hurts, but I'll give you a few minutes. I'll fill you in. 

Trapper guys went out to look for big ones.... Alligator snapping turtles, I mean. Some streams got 'em. Some streams don't. These guys are mostly just plain humans, but they know where to find 'em. I've seen carapaces (shells) over three feet long. Piney people say they can bring down a deer, even a black bear, long as it ain't over four hundred pounds.

Red Paint folks stock ponds with 'em.... killin' ponds. Them things got heads like you would not believe. Picture a big, old Pit Bull, reptile eagle. Got them little dragon spines gone up the neck too. Don't know if they continue inside the shell, but they do reappear on the big, fat tail.

Mister Edith say them beaks can tear out a chunk big as three cans of tuna fish, if you like stack 'em up one can on top a the other. Annie say she want a see that. She go - Please!? Please!? Please!?.... Tomas doan answer, but they probably gone stay for a little bit more. Conrad anxious to go home and see what the contractors done to his room, but hr not like to travel by hisself.

Matilda's ghost come back. Say she want a Dr. Pepper. Mama-Woman say - You can't drink that no more, little girl. You mostly dead now.... So they get her soda sale advertisements from the Shop-Rite over in Egg Harbor City, 'cause that mus' be almost as good..... Matilda don't say nothin', so they guess it all right. 

Few Red Paint fellas been settin' bear traps in the woods. Figure archer bastid might step in one. Then all they gotta do is wait for mornin' and see where vultures is circlin'. Pines got a whole lot a vultures...big ones.... Turkey vultures, I think they is. Look like teen age condors, if you ask me..... Best ass meat eaters supposed a be teen aged too. Them turtles, I mean. Nobody know why they growed so big. Folks say it shitty stuff from back in the day when they used to have iron foundries 'round here. But them was itty-bitty foundries. And that was over hundred years ago. Must a been real strong shitty stuff if it still doin' that today.... People say they gonna get government to clean up all that shitty stuff. And government say they gonna. But they never do..... I try to be healthy, so you know how much I hate shitty stuff.

Edith say she think they catched somebody. Don't see it. It jus' in her brain. And from the way that Moe-Larry-Curly dog be howlin', she jus' may be right. 

Now, I gotta stop, 'cause my neck hurtin' too bad.

So y'all gonna have to 'scuss this 'mongst yourselves.

Good night..... I think like a spider must a bit me.

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