Sunday, February 3, 2013

Like Bilderberg Conference, But Different... THE VAMPIRE REVELS 2/3/13

Let me tell you about the Hunt Room. I was there with them. Edith was too. At first we didn't know if we were supposed to join in, but the thin woman from Hungary was there and she was a mortal. Now, Hungarians do have some weird mojo going on, but she was still mortal. 

It's me, wilkravitz.... just in case you didn't know. Baylah said you probably did, but I like to be clear about things.  So it was us, the group from Philadelphia, the thin Hungarian woman and a life-eater couple from Santa Barbara. We couldn't figure out how old they were. Neither one ever said. Tomas tried to feel them out, but nothing... nothing. They were cordial enough. He smoked these little, orange, woodsy cigarette/cigar things. Didn't ask if anybody minded. I mean some of us did have real, biological functions going on in our bodies. The wife apparently was adept at some sort of magic. She did this thing with her hands and the smoke disappeared. You could still smell the orange, woodsy part, but no obvious smoky smell. 

Now the room wasn't the real hunt room. That space was bigger. We were set up in a little chamber off to the side. The real hunt room was filled with mounted antlers and stag heads...boar heads too. Looked just like the logo for them cold cuts. Huge hall. Cold and brutal. Our room was more like a little sitting room, not gray, or barren, or castle-style at all. Tomas said it reminded him of what they have in Scotland...wing chairs positioned 'round a strong, oak table. Paneled walls.... little chandeliers with dark green shades over the lights.... thick oriental rug.... small fireplace with a carved, stone surround.... Boy, don't I sound like a real estate ad? Look, I don't know how to post photographs and I just want you to know.

That is odd though. I Google it and I study it and I almost grasp it. But at the very moment I try to do it...BOOM, it's out of my head. WHOOSH, it's out a there. Edith says no matter what they say, vampires don't like publicity, so maybe my selective forgetfulness is their doing? They like being talked about. They can accept that. But pictures make them nervous. I don't mind. A guy who runs a big promo/social site, told me on Twitter that he'd show me how to do it. @ScopeQLQPasa, that's where he is. Go look. If you write, or create, or make movies or video, you might like it over there. Very visual. That's why I gotta learn how to handle photos.. But I did ask Tomas if he was making me forget..... He didn't say, although he did give me two hundred and fifty dollars in travelers' checks. Don't ask... vampires worry about travelers' checks. Edith says they do it to look normal. If anybody investigates 'the group traveling out of Philadelphia.' we won't look so weird.

Functionaries came in with little aroma candles. I think they were like vanilla and musk this time. Don't ask me. I don't know.  Smelled good, though. Left little bottles of vodka too. Like what you get on the airlines...if you go first class. We go private and that's even better. Put down a tray of cheese and pepperoni and crackers for the mortals. Baylah said she likes the way cheese feels. Sarah said Muenster used to be her favorite. Then she got real quiet. Sometimes she thinks about thinks. You know, she is only a little older (in vampire terms) than Annie. I KNOW the thought of running into one of her mortal relatives terrifies her. Not that she has so many, but still....

Annie isn't with us. She's with her boyfriend, Larry, and this other 'kid'.... little 'goth' thing who thinks she looks like Winona Rider from Beetlejuice. They got their own group with two mortal kids. But the mortal kids are real adepts. Know a lot a necromancy shit, so Annie ain't gonna try nothing. Don't know what they're gonna talk about.... probably Justin Bieber, or how to write cursive. Tomas checked up on her. That's how we know. Funny, in so many ways, Annie is very old...almost ancient, like she was born to be this way. But she's also still a child who likes coloring books and squirtin' whipped cream from a can into stranger's faces when she's out on the street. Look, she used to bite toes off. Still does, every once in a while. So the whipped cream we'll accept. 

Some music began to play in the background, in the room where we were, I mean. Can't pinpoint the source. Think it's 'King' Rafe's magic. Baylah said it was the score from 'ONCE.' That's a Broadway show.  You know, what with her piano bar and all, she knows. I liked one song about still having 'time' and all. Vampires think about time a lot. They can just sit and stare into the middle distance looking at time and space..... like they're studying the fabric of creation. Sometimes I forget how 'miraculous' they really are. 

The thin Hungarian woman had real nice, long auburn hair. Sort of like Sarah's, but longer. Nice smile too. She ate some of the cheese. Edith and I were glad she did, 'cause that made it all right for us to take some too. Good pepperoni. Bet it came from Italy.

The Santa Barbara night-folks wanted to discuss the economy and what we could do to promote the creation of wealth. He owns a whole lot of real estate along the Middle Coast between Los Angeles and San Francisco. Something to do  with computers too. Said vampires cannot afford to be divorced from such things. Gives them a little bit of control over things. Tomas doesn't like vampires who talk like that. You know how religious he is, don't you? Passover's his big thing. The miraculous night when God came to save him. He cries. He prays. We have a Seder (means 'the order' as in sequence, or 'the service'), with Pascal Bread (matzoh) and everything. Edith cooks it. She can cook anything. Some of the Red Paint people eat with us, so there'll be a few more mortals at the table. Tomas says God came to rescue each and every one of us. He tells the story of the first born, little Egyptian children being translated into the ranks of the heavenly cherubim when they died. He tells about the prince of Egypt who stepped down from greatness, but rose to glory. Tomas is a real medieval Jew, holy roller. Believe me, I NEVER expected to meet a vampire like him. But now I know there's quite a few...other Jews... Christians..... Muslims. It's like Tomas says... 'Faith never dies'..... Might need some intensive care once in a while, but it comes back. 

Tonight was just for all the groups to get to know one another. The Santa Barbara vampire couple is Brad and Lisa. Bet they know Nancy Reagan. Bet they knew him too. The Hungarian woman is Anna. She likes to be called Jazmin, though. Says it makes her feel younger. We did all talk for a while. They liked Edith's stories about The Pines. They liked when I told about blogging all this. Brad says he might know an agent in Brentwood.....

I liked Brad..... gonna keep in contact with him....

Goldie Hawn and her group must of been somewhere close by, 'cause I could hear her laugh. An interesting place, THE REVELS. And when it does get too obtuse for me, I mess with my Kindle (it's small, they don't mind). Found an interesting site, comforting and wise. Click onTHE LADY FROM GREEN BAY . You might like it too.

I told you... We only pretend this is fiction.... Please nominate me for a SHORTY AWARD...just tweet this ~~~> I nominate @wilkravitz for a SHORTY AWARD in #BLOGGER because of his stories and narratives..... Thank you. Thank you all very much...

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