Sunday, August 25, 2013


Late at night the crickets come out. All over town you can hear them scraping the comb-like plates of their carapaces together to make songs. Tom crickets call to hen crickets. Insect fornication hangs heavy in the warm steamy air. Some kind a little biting things are flying 'round, but I do not know what they are. Them what got air conditioners runs 'em. Them what don't make due with fans..... Bed bug weather... itchy, thick and sweaty. 

Lot a folks refugee up to the highlands. Ain't got no lycanthro-sharks up there. Sneak out in dribs and drabs, maybe one car at a time. Drive real slow so's not to make no noise. Them monsters are tired, like fat bastids at a buffet what ate too much cheap, gummy cheesecake. You can smell 'em sleepin' in the shadows.... ammonia smell.... wolf smell... dog smell actually, like sour milk and stale Doritos. Three of 'em holed up behind the inflatable bed store. Big suckers too... Long and thick and strong. I do not know exactly what breed a shark them God damn werewolves were messin' with. Must a been like huge ones. Tiger sharks, maybe, 'cause guy from the junior college find teeth embedded in some a the remains. And he say they the kind they are. Seed a mean f#!kin' what's-it standin' by a street light. Tall son-a-bitch. Look like eight feet. Big wolf head. Big shark muzzle. Massive neck. Werewolf arms. Shark torso. Werewolf legs. Shark tail. Two loud-mouthed tramp girls seen it slice off a head wit' the tail. Shark tails is sharp... real sharp. Not sure whose head it was, 'cause big bastid chewed it up real good. Didn't eat it, though. But that understandable considerin' the abundance of nourishment they got 'round here. 

Some guys from the Veterans a Foreign Wars Post engage a few in street fights. They got guns. Freaky bastids don't. So now we got Veterans a Foreign Wars body parts all over Calais Street and to be truthful, some a them shark-things now DO got guns. 'Cause you got a remember that the werewolf part a them kind a like regular people, so they know how to shoot, since it like a natural, human instinct.

Folks is scared... real scared. Not all the refugees makes it. Most don't. Shark bastids ain't got no cars yet, 'cause they too big to get in 'em. But out by the football field is an old Oscar Meyer Wiener Mobile and some a them evil-eyed bastids been eyein' it real funny. 

Don't know if Wiener Mobile drivin' be like a natural, human instinct though.... But one a the Veterans a Foreign Wars guys what survived them street fights 'spects  it is. Guy from the junior college not talkin'. But he smart. Hell, you can see that from all the pens he got stuck in his pocket. Shirt stained up real good. That a sign. Everybody know that....

Guy wit' the pens name is 'Roger.' Next time we tell you 'bout him.

Oh.... Old Woman's weird, gruesome ghostie, shrunken head been floatin' 'round town too. Sometime it do that when Jimmy Fallon got lousy guests. Shrunken head fussy. Eye level... always eye level.... 'cept when it crotch level. Shrunken head crazy too. It not like one a them regular shrunken heads. It not normal. This one definitely not normal.....

more weird stuff at ~>STUFF WHAT AIN'T NORMAL ... and on Twitter at @wilkravitz too. we still waitin' for more a your FAME FACTORY self-promotion COMMENTS. til next time...

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