Saturday, May 10, 2014

The New She-Zombie Wants To Visit Her Folks ... 5/10/14

In a few days she was all healed. Not zombie looking at all. Had a rank, meaty smell, but Uther ran out for some kind of perfume or deodorant to cover it up.  Opal wanted DEGREE, Just Dance, Juicy Berries for girls, but our eight hundred jahr alt fleisch esser brought her some Axe Body Spray thing. The gender specificity of modern packaging means nothing to him. A sweet smell is a sweet smell. But he did get her the right jeans, so that part was good. Got a bra... a pack of Hanes for Her all cotton panties, some no-name 'bo-bo' sneakers from Target (I think it all came from Target) and whatever else she needed. Then he sat there playing with a little red, plastic, twelve ninety nine, hand held, battery poker machine (that, he got for himself) while she went into the bathroom to get ready. 

Zombies, at least the non-decomposing kind, wash pretty often. Not when they suffer from occasional bouts of stuff-falling-off-itis. Don't want to make it worse. But during good times, when they're smooth and all, they do. Some require human flesh once a month. Some every week or so. In between, just like vampires, they can tolerate water, alcohol and broth, but their bodies don't consume it all like night-folks do. Zombies dump and pee.

Opal almost felt normal in there. Hot water and soap can do that. Brushed her teeth real good. Colgate Optic White. Flossed. Still had some tough, little fibers in the back from that guy she ate. Then she started to cry, because she knew she wasn't normal. When she came out and saw herself in the mirror over the bureau, she just stood there. For the longest time she just stood there. Uther didn't notice. He was really into that poker game thing.

Opal said - How long will it last? How long will I stay this way?.... He looked up and said - I don't know. You might be a 'once a month' feeder, or maybe sooner. I don't know..... What's it like right before? - She asked..... Right before you eat? - he said... She nodded..... You'll see changes. Dryness. Stiffness. It effects us inside too, you know...... Will anything fall off? - she asked.... Don't let it go that far. You'll get into a rhythm. You'll know - he said. There are things we use, certain skin creams, certain oil supplements. Aromatic spices, herbs. Some 'zombies' maintain close relationships with physicians, dermatologists. That's how it is........ Where's your accent? - she said..... I can turn that off. I've lived in many places. I fit in. I get along. It's who I am, but it's not all I am - he explained........ You have something planned for me? - she asked....... You'll find out. You are very strong for an eighth grader - he said.... I know I am. I'm a ninth grader and I want to go home. I want to see my family.... He just looked at her.... She whispered - No, I do. I really do........ You realize you haven't been there in approximately one week. Maybe more. I lost track. God knows what your friends told them. You don't think the police are involved? We're not magic. We're not vampires. I can't sneak you in there. It's not that easy...... No, I guess it isn't. But I want to go. I have a little sister and I want to go.

The eight hundred year old fleisch esser knew she really meant it. But he had to stall her off, or it'd never work. So he took her to some late movie at a suburban repertoire house where they saw the thirty year old Italian classic, CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST. And Opal liked it. She really liked it. What did them lousy, crying, sniveling, naked, God damned people think? Just because they were 'uncontaminated' they deserved to live forever? She saw the cannibals as zombies, even though they weren't. And she saw the people as live, swimming carp in a fish market. 

And whether they were, or were not that, made no difference at all...


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