Thursday, September 11, 2014

THE STILL HUMAN, TOMAS. GOES A LITTLE BERSERK .. 9/11/14

You have to hide in the woods... blend into the trees, crouch down in the shadows. I can't be as quiet as I was when I was a vampire. Maybe soon I will be again, but not now.... I'm going to do it. I am. I'm going to kill somebody. you know when you just do it without any reason, or motive... when you just cut somebody, or stick somebody and keep on walking... when you don't even look at them, or smell them, or smile, or nothing it's like your invisible. 

A lightning bolt. You have to be like a lightning bolt. But no light. Definitely no light... just the stabbing pain. You know there are kids in the city... and I'm talking about before it all fell apart... about the time when I lived with my tight circle of vampires (and a few non vampires too) in a spruce, polished red brick townhouse down an almost hidden cobbled byway. How, oh so, very lucky we were. Well those kids were 'knife throwers.' That's what they called them. Boosted packages of old fashioned, double edged razor blades from Rite-Aid, or People's Drug Store. 'Snappers'... They called them 'snappers' too. You know how kids flick playing cards?...That game where they throw them down? I don't know the rules. I don't know who wins, or who loses. But they had this movement... this wrist action... Whip it through the air, just like a weapon. Well, they learned. They made it a weapon. Switched to razor blades... Much more lethal... One night I followed a kid... Saw him 'snap.' Blinded a boy... Two snaps. Just two snaps... Pffft! Pffft! Lights out. That was it. Blood all over. You know, the eyes are basically jelly-filled bladders... burst like balloons. He'd never see again and the world can be very constricting when you're poor and blind... Sit in the house, maybe by an open window. Listen to a lot of talk radio. Shovel in some food.

You want to know what I did? I followed that kid, the 'snapper' I mean. Could have killed him. Could have 'taken' him right then and there... Bit him... Broke the skin.. Drawn off the blood and that would be it. But that would be too easy and I wanted him to suffer. He went into a convenience store to get some blunts. I waited. Lots of places to hide in the city, especially for a vampire. Bet you were close to one sometime and never knew.Went over to a gas station (used to stay open later back then) and bought a quart of motor oil. Kid comes out with his blunts, I sneak up behind, douse him real good and light him up.... A human torch... And he never even knew what caused it. Hope he thought it was God.

Maybe it was. Maybe I was just an instrument...

But that other boy was still blind.

<more next time... I have to stop now... my eyes just wanna sleep... sorry. Tomas can kill somebody tomorrow>

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