Monday, October 22, 2018

They were Both Children in the Tents of Abraham

Before I forget, please allow me to share these dreamlike memories of my mortal life.... It is I, Jonathon ben Macabi. Some know me as Tomas de Macabea. I grew up in a storied place. They write tales about it to this day.... A land of sophisticated cities with fountain cooled air and souks filled with the treasures of far off lands. Domesticated elephants from distant Hind led every procession and the leader, the old matriarch, born in Mumbai, gave rides to the children in the outer courts of our esteemed ruler. Sages from the academies of Sura and Pumphidepha taught sons of the faithful under the loggia of Toledo. Honeyed dates were as peanuts. Sweet songbirds serenaded all from fanciful cages hung by doorways and balconies. The perfume of aromatic coffee was everywhere, a brand new novelty from The Yemen and a most welcome intoxicant in a culture that forbade alcohol.

In a sense, this was a respite.... especially for Jews, who had less restrictions than resident Christians, for both we and the Muslims were children in the Tents of Abraham and both proclaimed 'The Unity.' Though perfect it was not. All 'infidels,' those with revealed nonconforming holy books where dhimmis, protected souls 'in error.' We paid extra taxes, could be rebuked and reviled in the streets and theoretically barred from certain exalted positions, or providing legal testimony. The thing was, most princes ignored those possibilities most of the time... or at least much of the time, for they recognised our talents and used Jews and Christians (who might not have theoretically shared the Tents of Abraham, but did share more than three quarters of The Bible) to relieve them of the more tedious chores of governance. An uncle was vizier to a Taifa lord up north. My father owned ships that made the run to Fostat twice a year and although he never let on, one secret trip out beyond the Pillars of Hercules to legendary islands filled with dogs in the endless Ocean-Sea, from whence came the spice chocolatl, brought to that place by shipwrecked mariners from the west. Perhaps they hailed from Atlantis?

I think of those times.... I do... And please don't laugh, but I often dream of using my special abilities to help bring peace to the Middle East. A vampire can do many things behind the scenes.... Hidden things... and with a much lighter touch than those graceless fools sent out by the House of Saud (so they say)... My way doesn't even leave a body. Regular readers know why...

Oh, why, oh why did I oh,

Oh, why did I leave Toe-LAY-do?

Anyone get the musical reference???.... Living in Philadelphia for over three hundred and thirty years one sees ALL the shows.

Forgive me this digression. But I'm sitting in the little library downstairs. The townhouse is quiet and rather dark. Edith (our housekeeper) occupies her perch by the the granite counter in the kitchen doing seek and find puzzles. Everyone else is out. It's just me and the little ghost of the boy who died in the cellar about sixty seven years ago. He likes this room too... Plays war games with the onyx chess set. I love that kid...

Now let me get out on the streets and 'cull' somebody....

click HERE to see all Vampire Wonderland posts and learn a lot of things...

click on THESE WORDS... to join Billy on Twitter for even more...

Buenos noches.


Wednesday, October 17, 2018

the music of Tom Odell woke our vampires up 10/15/18

No more lies. Not that's it all been lies, but for seven years I've sometimes pandered to what I imagined you'd want to hear. But that was a mistake. I am not a juvenile. I am not made for teen aged vampire angst. Jonathon (yo-na-TAHN) ben Macabi (ma-KAH-bi) is not fiction. Do you know that? Can you accept that?... 'Reality'... my friends, can be quite intoxicating...

For approximately one thousand years, I have sheltered in this 'eighteen' year old body, the pampered scion of an old Spanish family going back to The Caliphate of Cordoba. But those as yet unfamiliar with my 'nativity' can always click on http://feedreader.com/observe/vampirewonderland.blogspot.com ... scroll back to the beginning (August 9th, 2010... I think it was) when one of my esteemed 'familiars' started to transcribe this wandering account right here...

Autumn is a special season for 'life eaters.' Our humors quicken. The chill suits us, for it matches the extreme coolness of our skin... and the increased darkness... well, what's not to like about that?... Life, for those you call 'vampires' slows down. Can you imagine what high summer is like for us? Only eight hours of true darkness and the heat rising from the streets... from the buildings... from the cities... Granted, mortal odors entice us, but the unending, animal stink sickens all but the most feral of our breed. I can tell you what it was like in the past, but you wouldn't believe me. Fecal contamination was everywhere. Bathing, among certain faith communities was seen as a heretical conceit. Please know I speak of more remote (to you, anyway) eras, yet even the nineteenth century and a good bit of the twentieth, if we're going to be truthful. left a lot to be desired.... The twenty-first (stares into camera)... permit me to demure...

So I array myself in my 'uniform.' ... the black jeans, trim leather bootkins, black dress shirt and close fitting quilted leather jacket.... all available at MACY'S, by the way. I get a cut. Not that I need the money... not after centuries of quietly snatching rings and purses from my unsavory victims, along with collectible knick knacks and all... but I do crave the notoriety. Look, by this point I imagined at least an edgy cable series based on my life. But it's all who you know and who does a finely drawn, well put together, Spanish-Sephardic aristocrat with dramatic wavy hair know in L.A.?... If they only knew what they've ignored.

I retell much of this every two years, for new comers basically. There's supposed to be a 'page two' on this blog. I don't know what's on it... even Billy's forgotten.... Memo to self ---- Put a basic synopsis and Vampire Wonderland facts sheet on page two... Till then, if anyone has any questions, please contact Billy on Twitter. That's where he sits. Click Questions For Billy ... He'll be so pleased....

With that, the vampire known as Jonathon ben Macabi finger combs his romantic locks, checks his image in the mirror above the long commode table in the townhouse's  black and white marble floored entrance hall, steps out onto the Society Hill street and disappears into the night...

And check out Tom Odell's evocative music that got through to Jonathon in the first place on Youtube...

Thank you.