LMAO with wendy (liebman)!: Pescetarian Thanksgiving

LMAO with wendy (liebman)!: Pescetarian Thanksgiving: It's been so long since I blogged that I forgot how to do it!  It's a few days after Thanksgiving and I'm feeling grateful for everythi...and I can't eat the whole baby octopus at all-you-can-eat Chinese buffets, because no matter how you look at it... they're still dead babies......enjoy the wit humor and wisdom of comedian WENDY LIEBMAN  a pleasant refreshing break before our next installment (a bit later tonight...maybe after SNL)

25TH BINGO BOY episode for 11/24/12

Bingo Boy - post 25

They all go out for a nice Thanksgiving dinner. Little Chrissie, Ricky, the baby, Marge and a neighbor lady, named Mary, that Marge is friends with. He drives them up to a shiny, new all-you-can-eat Chinese style buffet by the multiplex on Grant Avenue. It's in a part of the Northeast that's still a little bit suburban-middle class. Thirteen dollars and ninety nine cents... that's how much it cost, per person, I mean. Beverages extra. But they had nicely browned whole turkeys up there and candied sweet potatoes, roast beef and baby octopus.... just like the Pilgrims. The baby really liked all the sights... the lights... the smells... the other children... the mashed sweet potatoes. He had a good time. They all did. Little Chrissie took out her new iPad, or tablet, or whatever it is. Sure she tried to be discreet. But what could she do? She was hooked. Had a blog now. Wrote stories. OK, so only twenty seven hits so far. But it's only been two weeks. Trouble is, she writes from life, just like that writer on Charlie Rose said. An artist now, don't you know. Wants to check her stats, see if she got any more page views. Marge goes - Jesus Christ! Put that thing the hell away!..... Little Chrissie goes - All right, all right..... And she does. This is a holiday... a pleasant occasion.... baby's first night out in a 'real' restaurant. She understands. She gets it. But what she don't get is that her writing is a little too close to real life..... a little too revealing. John, that other kid from the bingo hall has seen it. He's pretty savvy with computers. And Little Chrissie tweeted about it at a site called #PHILLYSTORIES. That's how it happened. Oh, he didn't know she was the author. But he recognized the bingo hall (she moved it to Torresdale Avenue.. a very slight improvement). And the 'Marty' character was still Marty, only now he answered to 'Sid.' Even he was in it. But instead of 'John' they called him 'Tom.' And in the story, Jimmy wasn't wearin' printed sheet togas down her basement. He was dead and cold and buried in a swampy, Jersey, Pine Barrens grave.

Believe me, Big Chrissie was very upset when she found out. True, she thought it was a coincidence. But she believed in 'signs.' 

And this one wasn't good. 

Oh, yeah, one more thing..... this Thanksgiving outing  marked the first time they let Jimmy stay home by himself. Not that he was awake. Marge slipped him a double shot of Benadryl, or whatever you call it and he was sawin' wood in Old Ukraine..... Plus the cage was still locked. She felt bad... No, she really did. Ricky said they'd bring him back a take-out order of barbecued spare ribs and fried shrimp, maybe a couple other things too, so that made her feel a little better. Mary didn't know what they were talkin' about..... I don't know. Maybe she did.....

And I ain't a ghost from Frankford Avenue, or any other part a Philly... I'm just a ghost from Seattle, so don't ask me how I got here. This 'bein' dead' shit is all new to me.... I either fell out a window, or got hit by a train. But gimme some time. I'll remember.....

Maybe it's because I like Chinese food?

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