Monday, November 7, 2011

BUT WHAT HAPPENED TO THE QUIVVERING SLAVE GIRLS DOWN IN THE PIT!?

Now when the vampires and their retainers escaped out into the Jersey Forests, they did so in haste. Time was short. Fear was rampant. Some things were neglected. Jonathon's much venerated tomes were left behind, his own writings and a beloved eleven hundred year old copy of La Ciencia Vampirismo.

But shortly after their departure, other souls ventured into their home. Functionaries of The Anti-Enchantment-Bureau tip-toed in. They carefully examined this and that. Packed up what looked to be important and locked up all the rest. A few people were assigned to the place as caretakers. They played the part of domestics. The neighbors wouldn't suspect a thing. It's that time of year when Florida-bound sunbirds take flight and leave. Even the neighbor who feeds her kid shitty pizza bought it.

And the 'slave girls' from the pit down in the sub-basement? Doctor Franklin took personal responsibility for them. Indeed, they are guests in his own palatial below-ground quarters. He dotes on them, overseeing careful massages, detailed physical examinations, minute bodily measurements and fertility readings. such good girls they are. No trouble at all. One of them has an interesting admixture of vampiric serum in her blood. Not enough to render her a life-eater, but significant, none the less. You should see what she does with small, household objects....... I suppose it's a type of levitation. Baylah can do it, but then again, she is a vampirina to her core.

Now to other weird and 'wondrous' news ---- Johnny Jump Up has killed again. Two students, one male, one female, were discovered lying dead on a Fairmount Park jogging trail. Their bodies appeared entirely normal, however all  flesh was carefully flensed away from their head and necks, right down to the collar bone. Internal structures, such as trachea, eusophogus and tongue were left intact,as were the eyeballs, blood vessels and lymph nodes. Bite marks were detected upon the hands, feet and genitals, yet the skin covering those areas remained essentially unbroken. No one saw the attacks, but a homeless man squatting under a wood and cement picnic table told tales of a cadaverous 'old fashioned gentleman' bounding through the darkness (although he did stop momentarily to peek under the table and wave)before disappearing over a tall, black iron fence bordering the macabre, crumbling necropolis of Laurel Hill Cemetery. Imagine, the very place where the elves and cherubs go to play.......

Oh yes, one more thing. A cruise ship off the coast of Greece was sucked into a gigantic whirlpool estimated to be over three thousand feet deep. Needless to say... no survivors were found. Yet in another sea, far away on the Jovian moon called Europa, some unwelcome guests locked arms and danced.........

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