Saturday, March 28, 2015


I'm trying to be quiet. Everyone else is sleeping. Night-folk, day-folk, everybody. Edith bought some grappa. I like grappa. think it's like a crude type of wine...very light... almost clear. And it's cold too. 

Annie wants to be a blood vial girl. Sarah says she doesn't have to, because she does that. I say how's she going to get into hospitals and houses anyway? She can't sublimate. She can't move through matter..... She goes - So? SO? SOOO!!??... Then she gives me an old fashioned razor blade, the kind that goes into a heavy, stainless steel, 'safety razor' from years ago and says - Please? Please? Please?..... She wants me to slice into my finger tips and let the blood run into one of those little test tube things she has so she can give it to 'nice' sick people. I say - How will you know who the nice ones are?.... She shrugs.... But with that aura of hers, she will know... Am I supposed to just give her the blood? ...She's serious about this. I say - Here's money. Go give them money. That'll help... And she takes it. She gives it out, but she wants more.

I think she misses her vampiric abilities. Edith says she might develop powers of her own. Annie says - What kind? How long? Tell me..... Says what she really wants to be is a zombie killer. Look, it's not like in stories. We're not overrun with decomposing, shuffling idiots. But they are out there. They are around. You remember Uther aus Ulm, the uber zombie... 'Fleisch Esser' he calls it. Google it if you don't, or if you're new. My God... Eight hundred thousand words... Must be more than eight hundred thousand words by now. 

Billy's getting desperate. He blames us. He says we want the fame. I don't know. Maybe we do, a little bit. But he really wants it. That's why he's on Twitter all the time... social networking and all that... What if it works? Who'd play me in the movie?... Who'd be Jonathon ben Macabi, also known as Tomas de Macabea... If they filmed at night, maybe I could play myself?... Hope there's no dancing in it. ... Listen to me. I sound crazy.

I decided on little rectangles of gold bullion for the 'Baby Moses Baskets.' They sell them in the Jewelry District...'Jewelers' Row.' I don't know where I'll leave them, or who might get them.... A long time ago, we used to put beautiful little dolls in the baskets... Pequenos Moises we called them. I could give you the Hebrew and Arabic for it, but I'm too tired. My mind is in English mode now. We used to hide all the little treasures around the doll and tuck it in with a warm soft blanket... Some of the old dolls are valuable relics now. Few know they originally represented Baby Moses. Boy, was he ever the poster boy for adoption... 'Poster boy'... Look how I use terms like that..

Please excuse me. I know there's two more hours of darkness, but I am so tired. Maybe not the way mortals get tired, but I still crave my rest.

Sleep, whether vampire, or mortal is such a special thing.

(with that, He gets up, clicks off the TV, which was really functioning as a night light anyway... closes the laptop, turns off the lamp and goes upstairs... the little ghost boy from the basement materializes out of the darkness and watches him leave)

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Thursday, March 26, 2015

Our Vampire Gets Jerusalem Fever... 3/27/15

The next night, Jonathon went to see the basket weavers, three ladies from the Carolina Sea Isles who made 'Moses Baskets' for him on a regular basis, at least since the Second World War. They shared an old Victorian in University City, not far from the Penn campus. Once they were nurses, now they bring sweet grass to life. You can buy it in The Reading Terminal Market. They bring it up for crafters... artisans skilled in the ways of long ago.  Miss Aggie, the oldest of the three, knows Gullah and not just a phrase here and there. She's conversant and fluid in that Old English-West African dialect once spoken by many people, regardless of background all up and down The Low Country. I won't go into the particulars. You can google those.

The second sister, Miss Lena, brought out the baskets, three, cradle shaped, high sided, vessels with handles woven in on both sides. She said - Look how the colors dance all around. Got green and tan and that red-brown color everybody likes. Nice grass this year. I must say. I can smell Daufuskie Island. (sniffs again) That is Daufuskie Island. Don't you think so, Bessie?... Bessie, the third sister goes - What are you talking about? I told you it smelled like Daufuskie Island. You got nasal polyps. You don't smell nothing.... Then she makes eyes at Jonathon. Miss Bessie likes the vampire visitor. She knows about him. They all do, only being polite, well bred ladies, they never think about it. Well, almost never. Back when they were nurses, Jonathon used to bring 'booster shots.' That's what they called them.... tiny little test tubes from an old toy chemistry set... maybe two inches long and a quarter inch wide. Sometimes he'd bring two. Once in a while three. Each filled with fresh, hot, potent vampire blood. You could hide it in gravy real easy. Mix it up in the mashed potatoes. Aides didn't ask any questions. Nurse'd say - Here, Frances, let me give Mrs. Lowy her tonic. Then, tap-tap-tap, in it went. And Mrs. Lowy got all lively again... giggled, made 'eyes' at people and everything. Did anybody do bad? You tell me?

Then they sat and visited for a while. The second one, Miss Lena, brought out homemade dandelion wine. Got the greens from The Reading Terminal Market too. Bring 'em down from the Poconos, but that's later on in the season. I don't know where they get 'em from now. Jonathon didn't want any at first, because sometimes dandelion wine has residue and to a vampire, that can be very distressing. But they assured him it was suited to his 'special condition,' so he downed a small, cordial glass, had a refill and said it was good. Jonathon was very fond of the three sisters. In truth, they were approximately ninety seven years old. But friendship with a vampire has its benefits and they did not look a day pasted seventy five. In return for the sweet grass artistry, he gave each a high grade, two and a half carat, pear shaped diamond ring. Figured they'd sell two and share the third.

He took a taxi back to the townhouse. Could a sublimated, but didn't want to contaminate such spiritually symbolic cargo with vampire magic. Had the driver leave him off on the corner (this one wasn't a 'familiar') so he wouldn't know exactly where the night-folk lived.

When Edith saw him enter the kitchen and put the baskets on the counter (each stacked neatly into the other) she said - Uh oh, Passover coming. Look at them beautiful 'Baby Moses Baskets!' What you gonna put in 'em?.... Jonathon ran his fingers over the neat, tight rope-on-rope pattern and said - Oh, the usual, candies, jellies, chocolates, maybe a few special things......

Last year you put ten thousand dollars in each. You gonna do that again? - she asked.

But he just shrugged and went upstairs, where he locked himself into the music library that was also a chapel and listened to Mendelsohnn's ELIJAH, The Passover Oratorio, in its entirety.... Then he squeezed his eyes shut tight til they bled.....

Annie peeked out of her room. She heard the music. She heard his voice.  Sarah was already listening by the door. The unusual, little girl said - Is he OK?..... Sarah whispered - Yes, shhh. Go to sleep. 

When vampires pray, vampires pray.

You know... he leaves those 'Baby Moses Baskets' around town. If you're in Philadelphia during the Easter-Passover season... keep your eyes open.

<more next time>


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Wednesday, March 25, 2015


Annie wanted to talk. Jonathon didn't. He was happy she got home all right, but when Passover approaches he gets Jerusalem Fever real bad. Just wants to sit and stare into the fireplace. Helps when it's turned on. Gas, you know. But even so...

Annie said - Some dirty lady with dried piss on her shoes kissed my face. Eww, she smelled like old man beer and cold french fries. Why'd she do that?

What did you do to her? - asked Edith.

Nothin' - said Annie. Just gave her a sixtyfive hundred dollar Mikkimodo pearl necklace.

How do you know? - asked Edith.... It said on the tag - answered Annie.

Sarah, who'd been reading a HOMES & LAND real estate listing magazine for MALIBU that came in the post (vampires are on a lot of mailing lists) said - Wait a minute. Where'd you get it?

From the box. From the treasure box, the safe, we got in the basement. The ghost boy showed me. Why? - asked Annie.

Jonathon, momentarily roused from his spiritual reverie, quietly goes - You're not supposed to look in there..... 

Annie wants to respond, but Sarah shushes her. Three heartbeats later Jonathon turns back toward the hearth and starts mouthing prayers again..... Sarah says - How'd you open it?..... Annie shrugs - Why, didn't I do right? It was 'house treasure.' Didn't belong to nobody. Not nobody special. What'd I do???

Sarah - Nothing. Just leave that safe alone. We have to be careful how we use that treasure. We don't want to attract any unnecessary attention. Do you understand?

Annie nods.....

Sarah - How'd did you open it?

Annie - The little ghost boy told me. He saw. He saw when Jonathon did it. He's got a real good memory (trails off) Knows a lot a poems...

Sarah - Is that all you took?..... Annie nods...

Sarah - Then where'd you get those five carat, diamond stud earrings? (quietly) One still has the tag.

Annie - Ohhh, I forgot...

Sarah smiles and shakes her head.

Annie - Can I wear 'em for a little bit?

Sarah - Til you fall asleep. Come on. I'll read to you. I'll tuck you in... Annie goes - From The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry???... Sarah goes - What else?.....

They go upstairs.... Edith says - Night.... Annie says 'night' too.... Jonathon mumbles his own send off.

Edith thumbs through the Malibu real estate magazine.

Jonathon returns to 'out of body land.' He awakens to the clarion call of the ram's horn, as The Children of Israel and The Mixed Multitude that joined them, march forth in amazement from the delta city of Ra-Pythom, into The Arms of God...

Wow! Did you know beachfront, Malibu rents for one hundred thousand dollars a month?

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Billy Kravitz' vampire wonderland: JONATHON a.k.a. TOMAS, IN PERSIA DURING THE AGE O...

Billy Kravitz' vampire wonderland: JONATHON a.k.a. TOMAS, IN PERSIA DURING THE AGE O...: The voyage down the Red Sea and around Arabia Felix, as The Yemen was known in those days was uneventful. I fed before we left. Twins, they...BEHOLD! As Jonathon and Sarah wait for Annie to come home, after her night wandering the city, our vampirino regales his present 'wife' with tales of nights in Old Persia soon after his vampiric transformation. They sit, bundled up, in the cold, March, kitchen garden (basically a glorified patio) out behind the townhouse, staring up at the distant, 'icy' stars.

Please click on the title, up above, to see what he said. the Sassanid Empire was a very special place.


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Tuesday, March 24, 2015


They let me out by myself. Nobody bothers me. Edith says I have this aura. Piney People call it a 'heart fire.' I can walk down the most rough, common, shitty, shitty street there is and stick my tongue out at people and give them the finger, but they won't even see me. I'm not invisible, just protected. 

The lady in the Rite-Aid laughed when I tried to pay for a copy of Coastal Living Magazine (I like beaches). She said - Keep your money, honey.... And she gave me a CLIFF BAR too... peanut butter, the kind I like. Before I left, Jonathon said - Annie, please don't come back too late. You know how we worry... I told him they did not have to worry, 'cause they don't. You know how Eddie Murphy looked for a golden child in that old movie? Well, I'm that child. Don't ask me how it happened. I can't tell you, 'cause I don't know.  And don't ask me about my regular-people family in California. I mean I love them and all. But it didn't work out. I'm The Flintstones. They're The Jetsons. I like Fruit Loops. They like crappy stuff. Like when I used to watch a DVD of DUMBO all day long they used to get angry. My mother got all red and blotchy (that meant nerves). I'd say - Can't you bastards see them God damned sons a bitches got Dumbo's mother in jail!.... My mama'd bang her glass on the table (big, thick bottomed, Old Fashioned, whiskey glass) and go - Can't you see them animals ain't actors, they're just cartoons!?..... I'd slap my hands over my ears and sing Somewhere Over The Rainbow real loud... and now, I guess, I'm there.

I buy myself little bottles a nail polish from the Walgreen's. They got the ones I like. Lady smiles at me. Hands me back the money and says - Bless your heart. Ain't you Little Miss Thing!... I say - Thank you and go outside... Coffee shop give me free pancakes and everything. Edith helps me paint my nails. Sarah lets me wear it for a night or two, then makes me take it off. I say -Are you a communiss'? What do you mean I can't wear no nail polish!? Don't you know I just bought three boxes a heavy duty Kotex for a drunk woman! Don't that mean nothin'?!... Guess it didn't.... I ask the druggist for diabetic medicine. Don't know how I know the words, but I do. Something puts 'em in my head. Then I go out on the street and give it to poor folks what need it. Voice in my head points me to 'em. 

Annie goes - I talk bad, but I'm a good girl... And you know what?... I'm gettin' even better.

With that she walks away, disappearing into the shadows. ... Have there been creatures like her before?... Of course, though they were mostly killed or crippled up, or made mute, or something. What do you think death camps, Coliseums and auto da fe's were for? Come on. Grow up.

But no one bothers her, as she walks through dark, narrow, sticky, alleys, where 'crazy people' sleep, or at least lay down and mumble.

That's how she learns....

<'then what happens?' comes next time>


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Monday, March 23, 2015

Billy Kravitz' vampire wonderland: A WEIRD & WONDERFUL GRANDMOTHER & HER DELIGHTFULLY...

Billy Kravitz' vampire wonderland: A WEIRD & WONDERFUL GRANDMOTHER & HER DELIGHTFULLY...: As we all know, the magic (or burden) of vampirism settles on each and every one of us quite differently. Some share the experience, while ...What if you were raised by your grandmother and she became a vampire to please her vampire boyfriend when she was in her sixties?

And what if she was still taking care of you into your nineties? ... It happened to a family in Manhattan. The grandkids were never much into vampirism and the grandmother didn't want to make an issue of it, although she doesn't want to see her grandkids die. That happens to responsible, family oriented vampires all the time... and it makes them very sad. 

Jump in here. Click the title up above to get started....

Billy just nodded off and bit his tongue real bad....

Oh, yeah. Before I forget, the old lady vampire passes the ninety +  grandkids off as her great aunt & uncle.

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Sunday, March 22, 2015


Annie has a purpose. She doesn't know it, but she suspects. I suppose scope and direction of her purpose means little to her. She senses power and understanding and knowledge. And she was meant to live surrounded by night-people, for who better to guard and understand a little girl like her?

I cannot tell you exactly what she is, though I can furnish an illustration. In ages gone by, people thought stars were tiny, pinpoint holes punched in the Heavenly Dome so fleeting beams of Divine Light might pass through. Perhaps she is one of those? Granted, her actions have not always been what one might call 'Godly,' but that happens. The finest hounds grow from unruly puppies. The being we call 'Papa' was attracted to her for a reason.

Some believe she came through more than seventy years ago. The tainted vessel, known as Hitler, knew. That's why he slaughtered so many children. Well, it was one of the reasons. Whether she was, at that time, a little Polish Catholic girl, or a German Jewish girl, or a Roma (Gypsy) or any other victim is not known. But she was there and they destroyed her. Now she's back.

Basically, she's just a child. Annie asks - What ever happened to the lady who gave her kid shitty pizza? ... Sarah says she doesn't know, but can find out. ... Annie goes - And the little girl too? The one who ate the shitty pizza?... Sarah nods... the little girl too... Annie goes - Shitty pizza, shitty pizza, shitty pizza. I like the way that sounds. There ought to be a 'shitty pizza' song..... Annie smiles. Sarah smiles too. They sit downstairs in the basement, playing Chutes and Ladders with the little ghost boy, the polio victim. He can't manipulate, or interact with physical matter, at least not consistently, so Annie takes a turn on his behalf. He likes that. Look, he still wants to win.

Edith keeps Jonathon company. They sit in his music-room-chapel. He reads treatises from La Ciencia Vampirismo.  She likes the way the ancient lambskin pages smell. The colors are still quite vivid. Handwritten old books are like that. In a sense, it's a bit of a compendium... lots of Kabbalistic texts distilled and slightly altered for vampire eyes and other paths toward the divine too. Night-folk experience so much. To be truthful, La Ciencia Vampirismo is still being written. Literate observation never stops.

Jonathon pauses, turns toward his old, mortal friend. Edith comments on the material in her own, homespun way.... The 'correction of the soul.'... That's what it's all about. And apparently Annie has a part to play.

The parchesi game down in the basement (actually a best of five series) comes to an end. Sarah and Annie let the little ghost boy win. He likes that. After they put the game away, Sarah takes Annie for pancakes. Their favorite Waffle House is open all night, so that's not a problem. Now, little girls out for pancakes in the wee, small hours of the morning might be a bit unusual, but 'vampire eyes' take care of everything. So they sit there, among twenty-somethings coming down from a night at the clubs. Sarah likes the hot tea.

Annie wants a few scratch-off lottery tickets on the way out. Sarah says they don't need it. Money, in their world isn't a problem. Annie begs. She insists. Sarah pays for three five dollar, twelve ways to win games. Needless to say, each one is a winner. Seven hundred and fifty dollars for a strange, more than enchanted little girl.

But on the way home through the dark, not quite winter, not quite spring streets, she gives it all to a part time homeless woman with nine fingers.... She goes - Hey, lady, you need any money?..... Woman goes - Sure. When don't I need money?.... Annie gives it to her, six hundreds and three fifties from the three, two hundred and fifty dollar wins.... The woman looks at Sarah... Sarah goes - It's all right. Take it.... The woman does. They walk away.

Annie goes - I like that. It felt good.... Sarah straightens the little girl's scarf and says - I know.

And they walk on toward the house.

Annie's changed... Not 'Little Bastid Annie' anymore...

And she's only beginning....

Edith silently opens the door and lets them in. Then she just as silently locks it.

Thus ends the night, as the first grey wash of dawn plays over the bricks.

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