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Bingo Boy - post 31
Now the next night, they were back in the bingo hall. It was a real hell hole. You could swim through the smoke. It stuck to your tongue and made everybody's clothes smell like shit. But the crowd was good...at least eighty people. Not bad for one a the first cold nights a the year. Hot coffee, greasy doughnuts, cigarettes, low stakes gamblin'... man, life is good. Sure, the city has a 'no smoking' law. Everybody knows about that. But come on... Who do you think, outta this crew is gonna complain? Maybe a few don't like it... but they like bingo more. And you know what they say when somebody tells 'em cigarettes cause lung cancer? They say - Eh, who the hell knows? When it's 'your' time, it's 'your' time.......Believe me educated they ain't... Well, maybe one a them is.... Some skinny, school teacher guy. And it didn't do him any good. I'll tell you how it happened....
Uncle Patsy was up there callin' the numbers. Look, he wasn't the only caller, but he was the best. Droned on and on with that low voice. Put 'em to sleep. But that's OK. Better they ain't so alert. Both a the 'bingo slatterns' (carnie for shills) were workin'. Diane, the big one starts yellin'. She goes - BINGO!.... Then she turns to her neighbors and says - I don't know. Somebody up there likes me. This must be my lucky day!...... Right away, Muscles trots over to check her bingo. He picks up a card, looks up at Uncle Patsy, who could play this part in his sleep, and calls out any four number, winning combination from up on the light board.You know you don't need five, 'cause they got a free space. Uncle Patsy makes like he's listening. Then he goes - There's a winner. That's a bingo..... Muscles starts peelin' off ones from his roll, a few fives too. This was a twenty five dollar game. She don't keep it. Marty gets it all back. He gives her a cut. Like twenty percent, I think. Only before they finish and start the next game, the little school-teacher-guy says something. He goes - Excuse me, but why do you always show her wins to the other one, her friend there?Let me see that card...... But Muscles drops it back on the counter real quick and Diane mixes it in with the others, like she's gettin' ready for the new game...... Uncle Patsy goes - Too late. Game closed.... School-teacher-guy goes - You know, nobody wins over eight times a night, like she does. That's a statistical impossibility. And her 'friend' don't do too bad either....... Sure he knows he should a said 'doesn't,' but look, he don't wanna get beat up. As it is, groans rise from the crowd. Some a the viragoes yell things like - Shut the hell up, you Poindexter, pointy-headed bastard you! Come on! Shut him the hell up and play! Drop dead, you ass-hole, you!...... School-teacher-guy holds up a paper, like a little piece ripped from a tablet. And he goes - Yeah, am I? Well, I been keepin' a record. And I'm gonna show it to L & I, or the district attorney's office, or the cops and then we'll see how they like it.......... The viragoes go...( No, maybe this time it was the harridans? Sometimes I lose track) - Shut that bastid the hell up! Throw him out! Get rid of 'im! Yo, Muscles, come on! What's he pay you for?!..... So Muscles trots over and leans over him menacingly.... He goes - Yo, fa++ot, you got a problem?..... The school-teacher-guy goes beet red, grabs his coat and scrams. Must a parked real close by, 'cause he ain't gonna last on those streets more than a minute. And the dumb cows stamp and cheer.....
Marty saw it all through the one-way-mirror. He stood by the glass and watched. Ricky and Little Chrissie were in the back room with him too. Did a lot a work at the counting table and some a the other kids were beginning to notice, but what were they gonna do? The three a them were talkin' when the trouble started. And now they start talkin' again..... Little Chrissie goes - We want a lump-sum payout...... Marty laughs. He goes - Who you been watchin', Kramer? Suze Orman?..... She goes - What the fuck difference does it make to you!? I wanna get on with my life, so pay us!..... But Marty's real cool. Just turns to Ricky and goes - What about you?...... Ricky says - I wanna get on with my life too....... Marty nods. He don't mean it. But he nods. He says - How much you want?...... Little Chrissie goes - Three hundred thousand dollars....... Marty grins and says - Are you crazy? Are you fuckin' outta your minds? Where am I gonna get money like that?...... Ricky goes - You can get it..... Marty don't answer, just keeps grinnin'. So Ricky says - We figured it out. The more we saw, the higher it went..... Little Chrissie goes - Yeah, you get two hundred dopes in here every day. They drop like thirty bucks a piece. How much is that, Ricky?.... He goes - Six thousand a day. Thirty thousand a week. One point five mil a year...... Little Chrissie goes - And we help you count it, so we know..... Marty goes - Boy, you kids know a lot. What about expenses? What about taxes?...... Ricky goes - We allowed for that. Come on. We sit here every night and watch. You think we don't know? You keep like seven hundred thousand dollars a year........ Marty blanches....... Ricky adds - And, Marty, our figures are on the low side........ Little Chrissie says - We know you gave half to Jimmy. You always talk like it was two hundred thousand dollars. But it was more than two hundred thousand dollars. It was more like three hundred and fifty thousand dollars. And now with him gone, you're gettin' it all. So actually, we're givin' you a break. We don't want half a one year's take. We only want about forty percent....... Marty just looks...... Ricky goes - One time. One payout. That's it. We're gone. It's over. You can't go to the police. We can't go to the police...... Marty says - Lemme alone. Lemme think about it.
And they sit there, in silence, like statues.....
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Now the next night, they were back in the bingo hall. It was a real hell hole. You could swim through the smoke. It stuck to your tongue and made everybody's clothes smell like shit. But the crowd was good...at least eighty people. Not bad for one a the first cold nights a the year. Hot coffee, greasy doughnuts, cigarettes, low stakes gamblin'... man, life is good. Sure, the city has a 'no smoking' law. Everybody knows about that. But come on... Who do you think, outta this crew is gonna complain? Maybe a few don't like it... but they like bingo more. And you know what they say when somebody tells 'em cigarettes cause lung cancer? They say - Eh, who the hell knows? When it's 'your' time, it's 'your' time.......Believe me educated they ain't... Well, maybe one a them is.... Some skinny, school teacher guy. And it didn't do him any good. I'll tell you how it happened....
Uncle Patsy was up there callin' the numbers. Look, he wasn't the only caller, but he was the best. Droned on and on with that low voice. Put 'em to sleep. But that's OK. Better they ain't so alert. Both a the 'bingo slatterns' (carnie for shills) were workin'. Diane, the big one starts yellin'. She goes - BINGO!.... Then she turns to her neighbors and says - I don't know. Somebody up there likes me. This must be my lucky day!...... Right away, Muscles trots over to check her bingo. He picks up a card, looks up at Uncle Patsy, who could play this part in his sleep, and calls out any four number, winning combination from up on the light board.You know you don't need five, 'cause they got a free space. Uncle Patsy makes like he's listening. Then he goes - There's a winner. That's a bingo..... Muscles starts peelin' off ones from his roll, a few fives too. This was a twenty five dollar game. She don't keep it. Marty gets it all back. He gives her a cut. Like twenty percent, I think. Only before they finish and start the next game, the little school-teacher-guy says something. He goes - Excuse me, but why do you always show her wins to the other one, her friend there?Let me see that card...... But Muscles drops it back on the counter real quick and Diane mixes it in with the others, like she's gettin' ready for the new game...... Uncle Patsy goes - Too late. Game closed.... School-teacher-guy goes - You know, nobody wins over eight times a night, like she does. That's a statistical impossibility. And her 'friend' don't do too bad either....... Sure he knows he should a said 'doesn't,' but look, he don't wanna get beat up. As it is, groans rise from the crowd. Some a the viragoes yell things like - Shut the hell up, you Poindexter, pointy-headed bastard you! Come on! Shut him the hell up and play! Drop dead, you ass-hole, you!...... School-teacher-guy holds up a paper, like a little piece ripped from a tablet. And he goes - Yeah, am I? Well, I been keepin' a record. And I'm gonna show it to L & I, or the district attorney's office, or the cops and then we'll see how they like it.......... The viragoes go...( No, maybe this time it was the harridans? Sometimes I lose track) - Shut that bastid the hell up! Throw him out! Get rid of 'im! Yo, Muscles, come on! What's he pay you for?!..... So Muscles trots over and leans over him menacingly.... He goes - Yo, fa++ot, you got a problem?..... The school-teacher-guy goes beet red, grabs his coat and scrams. Must a parked real close by, 'cause he ain't gonna last on those streets more than a minute. And the dumb cows stamp and cheer.....
Marty saw it all through the one-way-mirror. He stood by the glass and watched. Ricky and Little Chrissie were in the back room with him too. Did a lot a work at the counting table and some a the other kids were beginning to notice, but what were they gonna do? The three a them were talkin' when the trouble started. And now they start talkin' again..... Little Chrissie goes - We want a lump-sum payout...... Marty laughs. He goes - Who you been watchin', Kramer? Suze Orman?..... She goes - What the fuck difference does it make to you!? I wanna get on with my life, so pay us!..... But Marty's real cool. Just turns to Ricky and goes - What about you?...... Ricky says - I wanna get on with my life too....... Marty nods. He don't mean it. But he nods. He says - How much you want?...... Little Chrissie goes - Three hundred thousand dollars....... Marty grins and says - Are you crazy? Are you fuckin' outta your minds? Where am I gonna get money like that?...... Ricky goes - You can get it..... Marty don't answer, just keeps grinnin'. So Ricky says - We figured it out. The more we saw, the higher it went..... Little Chrissie goes - Yeah, you get two hundred dopes in here every day. They drop like thirty bucks a piece. How much is that, Ricky?.... He goes - Six thousand a day. Thirty thousand a week. One point five mil a year...... Little Chrissie goes - And we help you count it, so we know..... Marty goes - Boy, you kids know a lot. What about expenses? What about taxes?...... Ricky goes - We allowed for that. Come on. We sit here every night and watch. You think we don't know? You keep like seven hundred thousand dollars a year........ Marty blanches....... Ricky adds - And, Marty, our figures are on the low side........ Little Chrissie says - We know you gave half to Jimmy. You always talk like it was two hundred thousand dollars. But it was more than two hundred thousand dollars. It was more like three hundred and fifty thousand dollars. And now with him gone, you're gettin' it all. So actually, we're givin' you a break. We don't want half a one year's take. We only want about forty percent....... Marty just looks...... Ricky goes - One time. One payout. That's it. We're gone. It's over. You can't go to the police. We can't go to the police...... Marty says - Lemme alone. Lemme think about it.
And they sit there, in silence, like statues.....
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