Monday, March 2, 2015

CONDEMN AN APE, SAVE A 'BILLY'... 3/2/15

They sat 'round a table in a room within The Residence. Doctor Franklin had quite commodious quarters within his Anti-Enchantment Bureau. Vampires and other exotic quests visit from time to time. Please don't go by the name, but in the early days of scientific inquiry around here 'pro' enchantment sentiment was a problematic viewpoint to have. Rougher sorts and backwoods types were not adverse to burnings. Though by the late eighteenth century they were not usually publicized. Mustn't scare away settlers.

Tonight his guest was Jonathon. They sipped hot spiced gin in the 'tavern' room, as they pondered Billy's dilemma and how he might escape 'possession.' ..... Doctor Franklin said - Since the being, when mortal was 'mantid' or arthropod, a large crustacean might do the trick... maybe something like a king crab, or a coconut eating crab might suffice. Have you ever seen them? (Jonathon shook his head) Big ones can reach ten pounds with thick, muscular legs. Believe me, a horrific sight. They'll take meet too. Wouldn't want to be a lost, little Pacific Islander. I can tell you that.... Can you get one? - asked Jonathon..... I have merfolk, Jersey Devils and Yetis in there (gestures toward the specimen wing). I can get anything. You know that - said the old scientist.... But do you really think it would work? - asked Jonathon.... The scientifically preserved patriot shrugged and said - The number of limbs might be wrong. Even seven hundred and fifty thousand year old entities have memories, you know. We need something smart and something agile. I'm thinking a chimp or  an orangutan. Don't tell anyone I said that. Not to politically correct these days. You know the P.E.T.A. people wanted to come through here? They know about this place. What don't they know?.... How do you keep them out? - said Jonathon...So far, copious, luxuriant amounts of money. Nothing unseemly. Not to individuals. I mean to the organization. So they tolerate an incarcerated merman, or Jersey Devil, or Yeti. Besides, those things are not animals. (thinks for a few moments) I'm going to use an orangutan. Smart, but not too smart. And they move with a slow, precise mantid grace. Have you ever noticed that? - asked Franklin..... No - said Jonathon. I believe they're diurnal (active in daylight). How could I?..... Good point, my boy. Good point - whispered the Doctor. Then he said - Have him ready when next the moon shines bright. The van will be outside. Let my people in. They'll get him out. None will see. And should a nosy parker pepper the household with questions, let them say some sort of television or electronic device is being returned to the vendor. I've seen your eyes and by 'you' I mean all night-folk. None can fight such eyes.

So they finished their drinks and went to hob-nob with outlandish examples of lifeforms best kept in the dark. The Yeti trilled an alpine song in exchange for nuts and apples. Three pens down a Circassian Bear ate convicts, as right next door the replacement sea hag (the earlier aged mermaid died) sang sad songs of the depths.

One night hence, the magic begins. All prayed for success....

<more next time>

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