Monday, August 27, 2012

GHOSTS ARE NOTMONSTERS

When the last of her ashes rose up to the sky, the vampires came back inside. Sarah was quiet. She felt bad. Tomas repeated the prayer for the dead. Annie went back to coloring. Conrad had questions. He'd never seen the elusive ghoul known as Johnny Jump Up before. But none of the other night-folk wanted to talk. I really can't tell you where Mister Old Bones was. Neanderthals don't look that different. And Neanderthal vampires, apparently, are very self-reliant. He likes wandering around. Cities aren't his favorite, but he's still intrigued. Edith says he goes to the casino down by the river. I guess it's the lights and all the people. One night he won two hundred and sixty five bucks. Didn't know what to do when the machine spit out that voucher. He did bring it back though. They gave it to wilkravitz. And the next day he lost it. Not out on the street. In the casino, I mean.

He's typing this, but the words are mine. You know me. I'm the ghost from the cellar. And it's not that I go inside him, but I can work him like a puppet. You know, one of those marionettes.  The vampires are sleeping all snug in their beds. Boy, do they crank up the air conditioning. Edith don't mind, 'cause she's the hot flash queen of the Delaware Valley. And wilkravitz gives off more steam than a calliope. So he appreciates it too. Some ghosts gain strength from the cold. They're like electrical field ghosts. That's what I am. Winter time's my favorite. Hot, sluggish weather weakens me. Am I tied to this house? No. I can  go wherever I want. I ain't one a those crazy ghosts. Oh, yeah, right, I'm soon gonna moan. Still, they do know I'm here. Edith sees me. That little bastid, vampire girl does to. She hates when I touch her. Edith don't mind, though. Yesterday I made streaks in the flour. She was baking some kind a Piney crap... like flap-jacks, but different. The big, granite island in the kitchen was dusted with it. So when she looks up at the TV to see whether some goof from Michigan is gonna win the fifteen thousand dollars on that Meredith what's her name show, I write the answer on the counter. I write 'Mohenjo-Daro' (name of largest Harapan site in ancient India). Goof from Michigan said 'I don't know and I don't care.' Then she jumped up and clicked her heels, 'cause like she was 'walkin'.' That's what they do on that show. Lousy bitch. I would a won. Edith saw my answer and whispered - You got it...... I like Edith. She watches good shows. Some ghosts can change the stations. I can't. That's why I like her. It ain't the only reason, but it's one of 'em.

Papa's got a ghost too. But it don't come with the house. This one only sticks to him. Not that I know so much about it. I don't. I can't even see it. Think it talks Chinese. No, really. I ain't being funny. It really does sound like Chinese. I know from a short wave radio we had when I was a kid. I know what Armenian and Gaelic sound like too. They used to translate Burns & Allen (old radio show) into Armenian. But the guy who played Harry Von Zell sounded crazy. My dad said - Sounds like they're shovin' hot peppers up his ass...... My mother said - So, what do you know? Maybe it's a custom over there...... I miss them, but they ain't ghosts. So we don't run into each other that much. 

Look, I am not a monster. I am not a horrific 'shade.' I'm just some kid from the tenth grade, who died of polio. You might say I lost my body while I was still ,technically, alive. They put me in an 'iron lung.' It was horrible. Google it. You'll see. 

I'm gonna drift out to the backyard. It's real little. City houses don't have much. But we still got enough room for two or three chairs, some planters, an alcanthus tree, I think it is. You know, the ones they got growin' 'round train tracks. The birds, mostly pigeons, know who I am. I like to sit there and just look up at the sky. People don't think about ghosts being out in the daytime, but we are. 

I wish they had a dog in this house. Dog's like ghosts. There used to be a dog here, but they 'put him to sleep.' That means the doctor wanted too much money to keep him alive. So they shot him up with a whole lot a poison instead...... just like the Nazis.

It's been real nice talking to you. Oh, you wanna know what Annie's doing now? She's dreamin' she's killin' the kids on Glee. She dreams that all the time. She's nuts. 

But I'm not a monster. And I just wanted you to know.

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