Annie went missing. That's why posts have been few and far between. She just dissolved into the crowd waiting to see Santa Claus one night at the King of Prussia Mall. Sarah took her. She wanted to go. So they dressed her up as a normal little Caucasian mortal child. They put her in jeans and sneakers, a turtle neck and sweatshirt. They brushed her fine, soft, sandy-blond hair, anointed her with a powdery scent meant for little girls and that was it.... Annie loves mortal rituals. She joins in and sings 'Happy Birthday' every time the wait staff brings a little, sparkler-topped cake to some smiling simple soul at the Princess Diner they take her to for chicken soup on cold winter nights. Annie never eats the noodles, or the little carrots that swim around in it. She pushes them aside and gently drinks the rest with an oversized tablespoon. Vampires can ingest mostly clear liquids. Broth is OK.
Everyone looked for her. Jonathon went to all the dim sub-basement specimen storage warrens beneath all her favorite museums. He questioned all the dusty mummies. Many vampires instinctively comprehend dead languages. But the desiccated, old North African aristocrats didn't know anything, nor did the immense groupers (who could conceivably swallow a deep diving, female pearl fisher) moving through the shadowy depths of their large commodious home, in the aquarium 'cross the river....Same with the elferinas and elferinos. Same with all the night-folk. Annie was just gone. One moment she was explaining to the Mrs. Claus woman why she was wearing the wrong bra and the next she went bye-bye....
They asked 'Papa' her well formed twenty eight thousand year old progenitor, if he could detect anything.... He broke off his mid-space stare, momentarily making eye contact, before clicking on Will & Grace and settling in for his favorite show. 'Life Eaters' (the politically correct term for vampires) are such a strange breed. And the townhouse is such a strange place.
Edith, the witchy-woman housekeeper, offered to throw a hoo-doo. Jonathon told her he'd think about it... She went back to her seek and find puzzles, but proceeded to doodle old New Jersey Pine Barrens magic symbols all around the border of page sixty nine in her latest puzzle book... with a pen she took from the Citizens Bank. I think she hummed an obscure Piney reel, but I'm not sure. She might have just belched or wheezed or something....
This is where I have to supply a little background. You see, Vampire Wonderland has a minor alien problem. Once, some all powerful, off-Earth race decided to get funny with our oceans and Earth woke up surrounded by a two miles thick concentric roiling solid shell of salt water about sixty miles overhead. Not much light came through, so it was hard to see all the stranded ships and submarines and whales and fish and squid and seaweed and all just laying there upon the abysmal plane. Folks on cruise ships were real pissed, because the bottom of the sea wasn't perfectly flat and a lot of those top heavy luxury boats keeled right over, resulting in a whole mess of people who were gonna be dead before they got to the all you can eat buffet. True, there were some disoriented survivors stumbling around on the damp dark sand. Considering the horror of it all, they thought they were dead. People prayed. They called out for loved ones. You know families with little children take cruises too and Bic lighters only last so long. Biologists among you might know that certain marine crabs can survive for quite a while on dry land. Pickings were usually slim down there, but now, especially 'round the tipped over cruise ships (some naval and commercial vessels too, I guess) meat was all over. Close your eyes and think. You can imagine the rest....
Now Annie was snatched by some aliens, but not the ocean-moving ones. Ocean-moving ones are real bastards. And Earth did manage to reverse that strange interlude via hidden extraterrestrial info. World leaders thought it best we all forgot about it real fast. As you know, world leaders can do anything, because you all didn't know about it and that's proof.... Annie's aliens were from a more mellow, meditative race... like Mortimer Snerds with octopus tentacles instead of what we got. They had a different take on physical pain too.
So when they sent her back with a big old, multi-colored, swirly all day sucker, but minus one arm torn out from the socket, they had no idea what her (or anyone else's) reaction would be....
<more next time... and since this is a new year and 2018 and all, our aim is to make those 'next times' happen a lot more often>
click BECAUSE to see more Vampire Wonderland and if you click on SUBSCRIBE when you get there, you'll have access to the whole thing, which is a lot... no, really... it's like endless.
The females all squeezed into a little niche, a warm, dark pocket at the back of the cave. The alpha male didn't enter. He never does, preferring to stand imperiously away from the rest.... Scipio Africanus surveying the troops, attended by his loyal, for now, betas. They helped the human mother crouch down on a pile of rabbit skins and straw. ...'Daddy's gone a hunting to get a baby bunting. To get a little rabbit skin to wrap the baby bunting in...' Pity the poor rabbits. They get it every time. This 'daddy's' obviously accumulated a lot of skins. Shimmy Kate (the mama) groaned. She wanted to lay down, but they wouldn't let her. Hard, lupine hands peeled off her torn, thin rags. Someone drizzled water on her head, using a wadded up piece of moss for a sponge. Another wolfie female shoved a leaf in her mouth. She chewed... an instinctive response, releasing a drug-filled resin... It helped. Now we (the disembodied spirits who narrate everything in The Vampire wonderland) could tell you 'bout contractions and pains and rivulets of fluid squirting out from nether regions, but you've heard that before. A birth is a birth is a birth, at least among mammals. Some take place in sterile environments surrounded by shamefully high priced 'concerned do-gooders for hire,' and others happen in humbler places. Romulus and Remus were coming. Two little organisms jockeyed for position, waiting for their chance to survive the birth canal and breathe. And as far as these wolf-folk could, they prayed, or rather radiated a desire for a particular outcome. The mother might provide that. She had it in her blood. Let them look human. Let them blend in. Free them from the shadows and the swamps of the bayou. Other werewolves, higher castes, live that way. They talk. They look. They go and they see.... wolves when it's right and men when it isn't. The alpha 'prayed' too. Such a selfless thing he did, though the reluctant mother wouldn't think so. But if this worked, his band, in their present state, would disappear... rather like the Neanderthals. Yet permit us to tell you, oh 'human' children, that first-formed lines do not disappear, not truly. They are with us still, running through creation like underground streams... cold, dark and abiding. Romulus and Remus are coming. They bite and gouge and scratch even now, fighting to be first. And 'le monde lupiniere' will never be the same.... Allez le bon temps roullez....... Pardon our French, but we disembodied spirits hail from another part of the forest. And now the wolf-folk keen... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ see more VAMPIRE WONDERLAND. click ~>MORE VAMPIRE WONDERLAND ... join me on TWITTER ~> @wilkravitz ... COMMENTS are always welcome. bienvenue...
He built a little fire out of moss, or something that looked like moss. It smelled nice, like ambergris and musk, tinged with an unknown green scent that had a certain narcotic quality. The young ones fell asleep. His females quietly retreated back into the shadows and watched. There were other males in the lodge, but they were obviously betas, furtive beasts, just as imposing as their leader, though of quite different dispositions.... Three males... Two females... Maybe five or six children. All with the same gray pelts. The human female, the one called Shimmy Kate, studied them, as she sat hunched against the rough, thatch, igloo-like wall. A surreal scene, as might have played out in paleolithic times, save all of the tribesmen were werewolves. Their prisoner/guest stared at the tiny fire, seemingly hypnotized by the orange glow. And the 'king' studied her. She was right. He knew it. She was right. All was quiet. One or two of the young ones stirred as they slept, but that was it. And then the 'king' began to speak. He sat where he was and he spoke. He said - We have souls. We have hearts. We know pain. Think not that we are monsters. Fear not for your life. Are you scared?...... The one called Shimmy Kate shook her head, for she was not scared. Perhaps it was the slowly burning narcotic herb, or maybe just the quiet peace about her, but she was not. He nodded and went on - They came from a different place and they changed us, taking essence of man and essence of beast. And we are still a new thing, for that was only ten generations past. Frenchman we were and Creoles and Spaniards.... those you call 'Indians' too. The settlement on the river was new then, filled with long, low dwellings and shuttered windows to keep out the heat. Dark skinned captives from a strange, exotic place spoke of 'old gods,' and so we learned the voo-doo. Spirits, rather curious spirits came to watch. They sailed in ghostly orbs... in ships made of light. We asked questions. Occasionally they answered. But we were clay to them, the same as Adam and so they made new things. Don't ask me how they did it. Such alchemy I do not know. They took different things, alien things. They worked miracles. And mothers brought forth wolflings. And she-wolves brought forth men..... One of the females began to moan and keen, obviously remembering an old sadness. He crawled over to comfort her and she kissed him. Shimmy Kate found her voice and said - Please, I want to leave.... Her host said - And how will you elude the bloodhounds? They who have guns lead them and they already come this way....... H-how do you know that? - she asked. The wolfman simply sniffed the air and smiled. They left with the first light of dawn, silently snaking through the bayou toward another place, deep within a cave, beyond a little hidden waterfall, where trackers could not find them. And Shimmy Kate went with them, a lost, skinny white girl amid a stream of gray. Breeding stock. That's what she was. Breeding stock. But she didn't know that yet... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ find more of this and other stories too. click on ~>PARANORMAL TALES ... join me on Twitter. click on ~> @wilkravitz ... please leave a COMMENT. thank you.
No regular post tonight. Am abducted by aliens, but the cool kind who stop off at really cool places and let me work the controls. Please ask those you know to visit ~>THE VAULT ... so they can pick and chose between ALL our episodes (over 1,200) and leave COMMENTS that will be seen by people and highlighted on TWITTER by me. Psst! Wanna meet celebrities??? Hit ~>COOL COMIC DIRECTOR ...COOL WRITER ... and tell them how you got there. Oh, hit this one too ~>COOL HOT GORE-FEST DIRECTOR ... and tell him too. Must stop now, 'cause the aliens are taking all of us to some kind of an alien WAFFLE HOUSE and I gotta take a store-brand ZANTAC just in case.... Hear they got humongus waffle irons... a whole person could stretch out in one of them! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jonathon hung suspended in a dark gray void. He occupied space, but felt nothing. Thoughts were nebulous at best. He had no name, nor was he self aware. He existed. Perhaps rocks and snow storms feel this way? Tomorrow they'll begin the transfer. His blood, now within the body of the old man, will come back to him. Every particle of his being will grab hold of it and his physical form will be restored. Powers will re-ignite and four hundred thousand dreams shall dance again. That which is now but a papery lantern will shine. Such is the enchanted recipe necessary for vampiric birth. But this is not a love story, or even one of lust. A violation happens here, unless someone can stop it. The old billionaire, known as Tobias Maxwell eats soup. Seafood Lorraine, I think it is.... a rich, velvety, shrimp and lobster bisque. He loves the stuff. And where, before, it would dribble down his trembling chin and onto a loose, flabby paunch, now it stays inside him.... and he says - ahhhh. Even the first step of night-folk transformation has benefits. While a mile away, 'Papa's' body sits in the usual place. He stares at the flat screen. Some home restoration program, I think it is. Annie, his vampire descendant, colors on the floor. This is a new one..... The Kardashian Sisters Go To The Czech Republic, I believe. Kim wears a bikini and a fur coat, as she leads the singing in a lively beer hall. And then he mumbles something. For the first time in months, 'Papa' talks. The words are not important. No one knows what he said. Edith, their Piney woman, seer, friend and housekeeper goes - It's that ugly light fixture what done it (referring to a retro, 'Memphis,' monstrosity on TV). But she's only guessing...... Annie goes - Who the hell cares, you fat, old bitch... as she colors Kim's belly a vivid green..... But Edith isn't listening. She watches 'Papa's' eyes come back to life. He sees something ..... and it's very far away. Half a billion miles hence the 'diamonds' start to dance. Tiny iridescent lifeforms, somewhat like sea slugs, though also resembling eels, undulate through the Pan Europan Sea. And 'Papa' swims with friends. Stately ray-like beings glide toward the ice-crust roof, there to dine on hanging moss-like gardens. Bio-luminescence lights this cloistered world. Every soul doth shine. Some glow green and others blue. A few pulse red and white. ..... And the ray-king communicates with his spirit guest. He tells 'Papa' things. He tells him of home. But, in truth, 'Papa' knows too. Jonathon needs help and 'Papa' is coming..... The call goes out on the Human Home World (also known as Earth) too. Mole-folk whisper and congregate. They stream through tunnels toward a rendezvous in the dark. Perhaps Jonathon feels it? Or, maybe, he does not. But that boy has friends. Sarah puts down her book. The mortal friend, named Phyllis says - What's wrong?.... But the lonely vampirina doesn't answer. She just pulls herself up out of the old wing chair and walks out of the shop. The small brass bell above the door rings as she departs. And deep within his leaden tomb, her mate appears to hear.... Jonathon's crepe paper face smiles. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ thank you. to see the parts you've missed, click HERE ... COMMENTS, as well as your LINKS are very welcome.
Annie said he's not in there. She says his body is on like automatic pilot. It's like a house with the lamps on timers and the burglar alarm turned on. Edith says - How do you know?..... Annie (our juvenile, little bastid, vampire gal) says - Same way I know who's gonna win The Voice or who Khloe Kardashian's daddy really is. My brain just knows. OK!?.... So they sit there in the kitchen eating yogurt. Yeah, Annie's a life-eater and most mortal food makes her throw up. But she likes yogurt, especially Shop Rite store brand strawberry yogurt, even if she's gonna donate it all to the toilet ten minutes later. Every time she does, she looks down into the bowl and takes inventory. Vampires, some of them anyway, are intrigued by mortal habits. Not so much the younger ones (except for Annie), because they still remember. But older examples of the breed can look at a snotty, crumped up kleenex for hours, contemplating the zeitgeist of a sneeze. Now let's look out of their eyes and see 'Papa' as they do. He sits in that chair...the same chair... the big one, right in front of the flat screen in the 'family' room. And he stares. Whether at the images on the television or the empty space before it is hard to say. But his eyes don't blink. Well, they do, though not very often. Annie plants herself before him. She makes faces and twists herself up and does little dances. She sticks out her tongue and says curse words, real fast, right in front of his face. Like twenty five 'f' bombs all in a row. But he don't do nothing. Sarah don't like when she gets like that, but she ain't here much. Stayin' at her old book shop's like a security blanket. Makes her forget how much she wants Jonathon back. Right now she's sitting in that wing chair, under a warm, little pin-up lamp, reading an old copy of THE AGE OF INNOCENCE. She likes all them old bigoted, howdy-do, white glove, social niceties. But Annie got it right. Papa ain't there. He floatin' around out on Europa. That like a moon what wants a be a planet. It go 'round Jupiter. That like a planet what wants a be a star. He under the ice, Papa, I mean, wrigglin' through that cold, salty ocean wit' them fishy folk.....manta ray people, I think they is. But don't look like no people I know. That vampire partial to aliens. But you gotta remember... he been 'round for like 'leventy seven thousand years. That boy seen lot a aliens...and (whispers) I think he play 'gidgie' wit' 'em. heh heh heh.... Still, he thinkin'..... It just move through his mind like maggot through a rice sack.....Heh, heh, heh..Edith all angry now. She watchin' late night re-run a Hoda/Kathy or whatever they call it. And she don't like when that dumb weather girl come on at two forty five, tellin' folks how warm it gonna get. Dumb girl always talk 'bout New York, Boston and D.C., but don't never say Philly. Edith go - Don't that orange hair bitch know Philadelphia bigger than Washington and Boston put together? Don't she know we got more fancy eatin' places and theaters than them two either?!.... Then she say she never gone watch that girl, or buy what they sellin' on them station breaks. Annie say - You want me to go to New York City and bite her up real bad? But Edith make like she don't hear and mess wit' crapped up plates in a sink. While all this goin' on, mole-folks havin' a pow-wow. They heard something (see last night's episode). They got suspicions. Sound travels real good underground. That why dead folks know all the best secrets. This be Mister Never You Mind... But all my good friends know that. Right now, TV got Michael Buble singin' - Fairy tales can come true. It could happen to you....... Boy, is he ever right..... Nightmares too. Heh heh heh heh heh.... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ thank you. hit THIS ... to see what you've missed. COMMENTS & LINKS always welcome.
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