Friday, December 23, 2011

A YOUNG VAMPIRINO LEARNS WHY

And Jonathon walked on into a different place. The being who was Eleanor Roosevelt was no longer with him. The Resurrected John Lennon was gone too. But he felt their presence as he went forward. The terrific immensity that is Saturn tempered. Huge clouds disappeared, til a soft path lay before him. He stepped down upon it and felt solid ground. Simple creatures, like unto the animals of the field moved through the bushes. Squirrels ran off before him and larks took to the sky. And it was a blue sky, lit by the light of a warm, gold sun. 

Vines grew upon the hills, each heavy with sweet fruit that perfumed the air with contentment and gladness. Soon he heard a voice. A man was quietly singing. And three heartbeats later, he saw the man, tall, spare and rich in years, though in no way bent with decrepitude. A vintner he was. Jonathon watched, as he lovingly pruned false growth. And when he was through, he put away his knife and held out his hand........Welcome - he said.........Jonathon took the hand and smiled.......What is this place? - asked the young Andalucian.........Do you not know it? - said the learned peasant.  Look to the hills. Inhale the vapors. Taste of the berries..........He offered of the choicest growth and Jonathon ate. Tears filled his eyes, as he remembered. 

These grapes are our grapes - he said....... For the bounty about him was that of his childhood. And the dry, rich wine made from this fruit was the drink of Andalucia and of the lands beyond the peaks as well. Now it was known that the Great Teacher, the philosopher of The Faith, Solomon ben Isaac, kept vineyards over the mountains in a place called Provencal. Jonathon, accompanied by his guardian-servant Johannan was bound  for that selfsame  land at the time of his transformation. And yes, he had encountered 'Rashi' (an abbreviation of Rabbi Solomon Isaaci) earlier in the quest, but never upon his native earth, if, in fact, this was that place. 

Now imagine not a sage dressed as Shylock, look to other dreams, for Proclaimers of The Unity were not like that then. The rabbi had a trim, white beard and his head was wrapped in a roughly woven sun cloth as any tiller of the field might wear. No robes. No silks. But a farmer's tunic over lose worn trousers. And Jonathon followed him up over a hill and down into a valley, toward a fine, stone house, such as chevaliers or bishops might own. A servant opened the stout doors and they went inside, passing through the great hall and into a smaller 'beit safer' (library or school). Other students, already waiting, nodded graciously as they sat down.

But twixt a heartbeat, Jonathon saw an anomaly. A small lizard scurrying 'cross the slate flooring had six legs, not as might be found on a creature suffering a life-long malady, but growing straight and true from a body meant to bear them. So he quietly said - Tell me, sir, what manner of place is this?...............

But the figure of Great Rashi did not answer, though one of the students began to chuckle.....

THE PEOPLE ALL SAW THE WHEEL AND THE WHEEL WENT ROUND AND ROUND

The star gazers of  Mars began to see a wondrous thing. The Great Sky Sea...the concentric briny shell swirling two hundred miles above the surface of the Earth, was beginning to break up. A thin gossamer string, like spittle from an old crone's mouth, arced out into space, stopping perhaps halfway to the moon. At that point it commenced to spin in on itself, flattening into a disc, rather like a miniature galaxy dancing about a tiny black hole. No physical laws explained such a thing. It merely was. And so they watched.

Those humans still on their birth world saw it too.At first the darkness lessened, like a false dawn from 'before.' Then cracks appeared. Not wide. Imagine hiking through the cool dark gloom of a vast primeval forest. All is gray. All is still. But then a tiny freshet 'does something' to the canopy up above, allowing thin, sharp poles of sunlight to pierce through the verdant barrier and find purchase upon the earth.

People saw the miracle and they gathered together in prayer. The Chevalier Jean Michel was there when it happened in Jerusalem. But that special place fared better than the rest. Israel worked with Ishmael and the Daughter of The Magdaline too. Each 'House' helped the other, so that the time of darkness was not so dark.

Other polities were not  so fortunate. 'Wolves' roamed the far places and many people died. It was worse in the great cities. Minnie knows. Blackie knows. For they survived the chaos of Philadelphia. And their story will come out. But this night is not the time.

Lailah was 'schooling' her father when the first golden rays broke through. She didn't even notice, not the way a life-eater normally would.. Living with darkness had become natural. Vampires grew complacent. In fact, even though she still 'culled' unworthy souls from time to time, she had forgotten she was one. But her father knew. And he froze in terror as the first weak tendrils of smoke rose up from her flesh.. No others were near. They had the small, central patio to themselves. So he scooped her up and raced inside, scrambling down into the cool, black crypts below. Jerusalem awakened. So did the rest of humanity's cradle.

And the huge, reflective disc in the sky continued to grow, till all the water was drawn up and the Great Concentric Briny Shell was no more....... Yet that is  not the truth. For the water still existed. All could see it clear enough, spinning like a monstrous, round, polished, silver shield (about the size of the full moon) in the cerulean vault of a clean, fresh sky...... Some of the people thought it favored a compact disc..

At the time this transpired in the vicinity of Earth, Jonathon was being ushered into Rashi's study. And one of the 'Song People' went with him.........

o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\oooooo/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o

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THE PEOPLE ALL SAW THE WHEEL AND THE WHEEL WENT ROUND AND ROUND

The star gazers of  Mars began to see a wondrous thing. The Great Sky Sea...the concentric briny shell swirling two hundred miles above the surface of the Earth, was beginning to break up. A thin gossamer string, like spittle from an old crone's mouth, arced out into space, stopping perhaps halfway to the moon. At that point it commenced to spin in on itself, flattening into a disc, rather like a miniature galaxy dancing about a tiny black hole. No physical laws explained such a thing. It merely was. And so they watched.

Those humans still on their birth world saw it too.At first the darkness lessened, like a false dawn from 'before.' Then cracks appeared. Not wide. Imagine hiking through the cool dark gloom of a vast primeval forest. All is gray. All is still. But then a tiny freshet 'does something' to the canopy up above, allowing thin, sharp poles of sunlight to pierce through the verdant barrier and find purchase upon the earth.

People saw the miracle and they gathered together in prayer. The Chevalier Jean Michel was there when it happened in Jerusalem. But that special place fared better than the rest. Israel worked with Ishmael and the Daughter of The Magdaline too. Each 'House' helped the other, so that the time of darkness was not so dark.

Other polities were not  so fortunate. 'Wolves' roamed the far places and many people died. It was worse in the great cities. Minnie knows. Blackie knows. For they survived the chaos of Philadelphia. And their story will come out. But this night is not the time.

Lailah was 'schooling' her father when the first golden rays broke through. She didn't even notice, not the way a life-eater normally would.. Living with darkness had become natural. Vampires grew complacent. In fact, even though she still 'culled' unworthy souls from time to time, she had forgotten she was one. But her father knew. And he froze in terror as the first weak tendrils of smoke rose up from her flesh.. No others were near. They had the small, central patio to themselves. So he scooped her up and raced inside, scrambling down into the cool, black crypts below. Jerusalem awakened. So did the rest of humanity's cradle.

And the huge, reflective disc in the sky continued to grow, till all the water was drawn up and the Great Concentric Briny Shell was no more....... Yet that is  not the truth. For the water still existed. All could see it clear enough, spinning like a monstrous, round, polished, silver shield (about the size of the full moon) in the cerulean vault of a clean, fresh sky...... Some of the people thought it favored a compact disc..

At the time this transpired in the vicinity of Earth, Jonathon was being ushered into Rashi's study. And one of the 'Song People' went with him.........

o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\o\oooooo/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o

please click on the share button. help spread the text. go back and read it all. learn the parts you've missed. leave a comment, so that your link can flow out with the story too. thank you and may the season of miracles be blessed for you and yours.


Thursday, December 22, 2011

BLOGGERS, STOP REFERRAL SPAMMERS FROM RUINING YOUR STATISTICS

I'm stepping out from 'the wonderland' for a bit to tell you about something all SERIOUS BLOGGERS need to know. MOST OF YOUR STATISTICS ARE INFLATED...ARTIFICIALLY INFLATED. People known as REFERRAL SPAMMERS are responsible for this. They make it LOOK as if our blogs receive loads of hits. The return traffic generated by curious bloggers (and others) increases their statistics, resulting in improved page rankings FOR THEM. It helps them attract victims to the 'money making' schemes they pimp.

Look through your stats. Do you get large numbers of hits all at once? Do you get traffic from sites that DON'T EVEN have any possible back link to your site? WHEN YOU FIND REFERRAL SPAMMERS...AND YOU WILL...PLEASE LIST THEIR URL ON TWITTER AT #REFERRALSPAMMERS.

BIG TIME INTERNET PLAYERS CONSIDER THEM TO BE SIMPLY A NUISANCE. THEY CAUSE LITTLE PERMANENT HARM. THAT'S WHY SERVERS DON'T GO AFTER THEM. But most of us need accurate statistics to reflect the efficacy of our product, whether commercial, or artistic.

So if you value your work and don't want to waste time playing a 'real world' version of Dungeons & Dragons, list these exploiters at #REFERRALSPAMMERS. If you know HOW TO GET YOUR SERVER TO BLOCK THEM, so much the better.

MOST PEOPLE'S STATS HAVE ALREADY BEEN SERIOUSLY COMPROMISED.

We DON'T HAVE TO TAKE THIS.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

LITTLE ANNIE AND HORSEY SKEEJUS

Annie was sittin' on a hard mound a dirt. She wanted somethin' to do. Already drunk up most a the blood in some old bitch squattin' in a old trailer. You found them, every once in a while, hidden in the Pines. I don't know what the leathery, wrinkle-puss did to warrant gettin' killed that way. But our stringy haired little freak had instincts about that sort a thing. She went after the 'Miss Hannigan' types, folks who tortures kids. So the knobby-chinned, hatchet face must a done somethin'. Maybe she pressed lit cigarettes up against  little kids' asses, or washed they mouths out with dried-up, hairy scraps a soap. Who the hell cares. Annie didn't.

Skeejus wanted to go with her. Oh, his little bat wings was shaken. He couldn't wait. Annie said that she'd take him, if after, he showed her the place where Jersey Devils stored all the souvenirs in they twisted off head colllection. That how them Jersey Devils do it. First they sneak in. Then they stand by the bed. Sometimes down by the foot. Other times along side. Depends how they got the room laid out. You know people got all different kinds a taste. Second thing they do is make a noise. They got this banshee thing they do. Wave they arms around. Kick over a lamp. Squeeze a puppy. Make horse farts. Then, when the dumb son-a-bitch wake up, they bug out they eyes and make 'emselves look real crazy. Now try to imagine how crazy they look normally, so this really must really be somethin'.Soon as the person finishes yodeling and all and shittin' the bed (lots of 'em does that), the J,D, grabs the sides a the skull, right in front a the ears, and twists the unfortunate head around and around til it just goes 'gook' and falls off. Do it right and what's left a the neck is all wound shut like an old fashioned sausage. They got a bone pit some wheres near here and Annie wants a see it. ......... Know how they navigate through the partially dead trees (what with no sunlight and all)? They looted a whole bunch a nine volt, key chain  flashlights from a  closed up CVS store down by the Black Horse Pike. Came with batteries and everything. Now being weird, little pseudo humans in their own right, night vision comes natural to 'em. But they like the little colorful plastic gadgets. Annie plays like they lazer beams. That how she woke up the old bastid in the trailer. Went 'woo-woo-woo,' jiggling the little light all 'round her face and eyes. Then, soon as they open, she says - Get ready to die,  you stinkin', old bitch you..... Old lady goes to slap her away, like she some low-life kid from that dirty muskrat eatin' family next door. But Annie too fast for her. Jumps up on her stomach. Grabs her face (jus like she gonna kiss her). Cracks it over to the side a little and chomps right into her neck. Old lady moanin' and groanin', tryin' to pull her off. But you can't do that to no vampire once they taste blood. Skeejus jumpin' up and down clapping his hands. Wings flyin' all around knockin' cheap, little knick knacks off a shelves. She did have a cat. But Skeejus squished it up real good soon as they broke in.

Then, when the show was mostly over, Annie lifts up a gray, stinkin' crusty foot and bites off a couple toes. Skeejus wanted one, but she wouldn't give it. Said he'd get it after he showed her the twisted-off heads..

But soon as they get outside, she notice somethin' funny. Sky not so pitch black no more. Oh, you or I would never a noticed. But she did. Vampires is sensitive to solar radiation. So she look up toward where Heaven used to be, 'spectin' to see the backside a the Great Sky Sea. And that Earth-shroudin' watery shell still there. Only it startin' to break up a little. Tiny baby droplets a brightness beginning to ooze down. Skinny, fuzzy cracks startin' to skate across the darkness. And she just stand there, all hypnotized by the show, til Skeejus ask her if she still  want a see the heads. She say - Huh?.... But then she remembers and runs off with him through the trees....... No foul-mouthed, little kid gonna pass up a free twisted-off head show, 'specially one what's also a vampire. It still dark enough....she got time.....

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generationwhynot-stupidgirl: Shameful Confession #2: "DJ Becky".....

generationwhynot-stupidgirl: Shameful Confession #2: "DJ Becky".....

TABLE-TALK UPON A FOREIGN WORLD

The former First Lady gestured for Jonathon to slide into the booth and she scootched in next to him after he did. Resurrected John Lennon took a seat opposite them, but immediately lost himself scanning through the choices on the small, table-top, juke box. He did love his music, after all. A young man in a well pressed white shirt and black trousers came by to take their order. Jonathon couldn't help but notice how much he favored 60's crooner Bobby Darrin. In fact, his little plastic name pin even said Bobby. Eleanor ordered half a Monte Cristo sandwich and a small Waldorf salad. Lennon got a grilled cheese and bacon. Jonathon giddily asked for a hamburger on a toasted bun topped with lettuce, tomato and raw onion. Bobby Darrin asked him how he wanted it. The inexperienced vampire said - Right away.

Jonathon looked out the window as a pod of those humongus, pumped-up, sausage organisms passed by. Their undulating movements resembled humpback whales on Earth and he became hypnotized by their dance. How do you find Saturn? - said Mrs. Roosevelt......... The well meaning vampire thought for a moment and said - Big.......... Mrs. Roosevelt said - I suppose in this star system it is. Now, tell me, young man, why do you oppose us?.................... Jonathon sucked in a lung-full of laundered, artificially cooled air, held it for a moment, quickly exhaled, and said - To protect our world. To save our people.And do you mind if I ask you what Josephine Baker, Ghengis Kahn and excuse me, is that Danny Kaye?....... His table mate nodded......have to do with all this? ...... We find them amusing - said the willowy old broad. That's why we brought him back - she added, gesturing toward the British Grammy winner. Sing us a song, Johnny-Boy..... The unofficial spokesman for the four mop-tops cleared his throat, slid out, stepped into the aisle, gestured toward the crowd, got their attention, composed himself for a moment and launched into a rousing performance of Back In the U.S.S.R., with Bobby Darrin and Janis Joplin providing back-up. George Harrison, reportedly, was attending a dinner for the Eighth Dalai Lama and unable to assist.And according to  the The Akoshic Records, King Shaka Zulu liked it very much.

A few thousand heartbeats later, after thoroughly savoring his juicy, flavorful patty of  perfectly seared chopped beef, Jonathon released his first anal toot in over ten hundred years. The dinner was quite a success. Nazimova slinked over, inviting him to a party, but he had to demure, for his Democratic Diva of a guide had much more to tell him. So they stepped 'outside,' hailed another trio of flying monkeys and were off. Lennon sang We All Live In A Yellow Submarine, as they swooped and swirled through the unbelievable immensity of the giant, ringed orb.

Meanwhile, back on a dark, cocooned Earth, Annie began to see fuzzy, pale cracks spidering their way across the under-side of the Great Sky Sea.. And her playmate, a juvenile Jersey Devil, looked up through the pines and whinnied in agreement.

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