Billy Kravitz' vampire wonderland: JONATHON a.k.a. TOMAS, IN PERSIA DURING THE AGE O...

Billy Kravitz' vampire wonderland: JONATHON a.k.a. TOMAS, IN PERSIA DURING THE AGE O...: The voyage down the Red Sea and around Arabia Felix, as The Yemen was known in those days was uneventful. I fed before we left. Twins, they...



A delightful early episode. Good place to jump in and bathe in the perfumed waters of Old Persia. Our (basically) courtly vampirino, Jonathon, also known as Tomas recollects some early days, spent east of the Levant and south of Muscovy.


Click on that first line, up above to see it. If you like, click on NEWER POST or OLDER POST at the bottom and explore.


Couldn't post a new episode, because we did #ff stuff tonight on Twitter and we do it right. took hours. But this is good. With almost 1,600 episodes, it's like a whole attic waiting to be discovered.



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Okay, NOW We Meet the Fourth Dimensional Man... 8/6/14

They dressed for the occasion, quite aware of the fact that they'd seem little more than two dimensional photographs to this erudite, far traveled being. 

Sarah, slightly intimidated by the whole thing, saved her new eighteenth century garments for later, preferring her natural attire... Tomas too... So they both made do with tailored jeans and white, cotton shirts. That which is familiar provides security. Billy wanted to wear his new suede, knee britches. You know the type. Wears his new sneakers home from the store and all. Luna didn't care one way or the other. Not like she's ever gonna 'get' with him. Put on a good bra though, 
'cause she IS still vain. Doctor Franklin did a mix and match...  black wool knee britches, a deep green Philadelphia Eagles sweatshirt and a good pair of Rock Port walking shoes. One sees things like that on the streets of Baby Philadelphia.... street entertainers, fire breathers, in cargo shorts and poofy shirts.... tavern wenches resembling nothing so much as  mid-eighties Madonnas.... small children sporting a Little Rascals meets the Seven Dials ensemble. I guess it reflects creativity and diversity... But as the lunar generations unfold, that won't necessarily be so. If people become used to seeing things that way, it's no longer new. It's just what is.

Well, let me tell you about that fourth dimensional guy. Think they call him Biff. And here's how 4D people diverge from you 3D bastids. Think of it this way. Imagine if at every instant of your life, you occupied every place you'd ever be in your life... a nebulous, misty, web weaving together your spot on the rug in kindergarten... the path you take when you walk the dog... all the toilets you ever sat on... If your body EVER passed through it, you (at all times) occupy it.... even if somebody else has occupied it too.

The entire population of 4D world forms a nuanced melange... a gumbo of unique personalities able to see into and all over everyone else. Though their focus of orientation can zoom in on particular areas at any time. 

3D people, on the other hand, only interact with the point in the universe they happen to be in at any one time. 4D people can talk to us, but move items far, far away. They can drink coffee in your kitchen, operate a bus and deliver baby tigers in India... Or just drift and observe... Que sera, sera.

In some ways, a bit like Olympian Deities. 

And all inanimate matter in 4D world operates the same way. Each planet forms a torus around its star. Each star forms a torus around the center of its galaxy. Errant comets and asteroids only add to the confusion in a burning bush of creation spanning eternity. 

Gee, what do you serve a bastid from some place like that?

Hope (when they focus) they don't look like bugs.

Doctor Franklin leads his group down the street. He hails a cab... a rather Dr. Seuss looking affair that takes them to a little place out in the country. 

They exit and snake down a leafy glade  toward a hidden cave. A soft, misty brightness rolls out to meet them. Billy's sorry he wore those suede britches, 'cause now he's starting to sweat.

Sarah says she hears some kind a show tunes playing inside. Luna says she smells farts. Tomas whispers an old Hebrew prayer. Franklin chuckles.

They step inside.

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MEET THE FOURTH DIMENSIONAL MAN ... 8/6/14

The young vampirinas were dressed by Madame Hortense , while Tomas and Billy went to Mr. Hopkins, a sixth generation Selena (inner surface of the moon) tailor and haberdasher. After two days of careful measurements, punctuated by civilized breaks for restorative beverages and sweet or savory mouthfuls, it was over. Each went home with their parcels. Indeed, Doctor Franklin had to dispatch a 'horse' drawn lorry to bring them back. And Martha devoted a whole afternoon to arranging draws filling cupboards.

<turns to face camera... Billy- Look, you'll have to forgive me. I've been tired for a few days. Glad there's finally some sort of peace in the Middle East. Haven't slept well. Thought I'd be able to post some good narrative this early morning, but brain keeps drifting off, like ice floes 'cross a chilly polar sea.... Wondering - Do any of the more social and advanced insects have any sense of self, or are they analogous to cells in a greater brain?... Why does Australia have so many poisonous animals?....(begins to breathe in a slow 'sleep-ful' state....  Camptown races five miles long, oh, the doo dah day...

<more next time. once again, I apologize>

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Fun.: Carry On [OFFICIAL VIDEO]... an inspiration toward PEACE and what I'm going to say... 8/4/14

I know there are a lot of people who just want to rant. I rant sometimes too. I know there are those who obfuscate facts on all sides. And maybe the rank and file (wherever they may be) are scared to even mention peace and acceptance. That's sad. But there IS an aware, acculturated community on both sides that CAN visualize such a blessed condition and I speak to them.


Let the creative souls of Israel and the creative souls of Ishmael come together. Let them present their hopes and aspirations to the world.. in song.. performance and monologue via a review perhaps. 


Stage it where the world will see... in New York.. in London..in Los Angeles. There must be inexpensive venues available. I'll bet accomplished writers, composers, stagers, performers, directors would be more than eager to contribute to, or mentor this special thing along.


And I'm not asking anyone to abandon their hope for a secure, independent home.


Simplistic?... Yes... But symbolic and, if the talent's as good as I think it is, quite infectious too.... Like a musical gesture... a first step toward reconciliation.


The title?... Well, that's easy... ISRAEL and ISHMAEL or reverse the billing in some locales. No problem. Donate a percentage of proceeds to bridge building. Hopefully, one day, have a production in Cairo and Dubai too. Security might be iffy, but we can hope.


Bet the ORIGINAL CAST ALBUM goes platinum. Especially if BIG NAMES lend their luster.


Who'd you like to see in it?


Pie in the sky?


Is it time? Are we in a spiritual drought?


Well, soon it's gonna rain. I can feel it... and you're gonna get all wet.

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Look, I don't have any cousins in the biz. But if YOU do, ask them what they think.


If we stage it, they will come....


First venue will probably be somewhere easily guarded and secured. I'm not completely naive.


But, maybe a little starry eyed naivete (wow, I spelled it right) is what we need.


And listen to the FUN video up above. That's good too.


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<more Vampire Wonderland stuff later. Doctor Franklin agreed with me that we should post this instead>


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NEW CLOTHES FOR VAMPIRES IN BABY PHILADELPHIA ... 8/3/14

Sarah got up early. She had a cup of tea. Vampires appreciate clear broths and thin, hot beverages. Their bodies require moisture after all and they don't cull victims every night. Then she sat in the salon (what we might call a living room) waiting for the others to come down. The android woman asked if she'd like some music. There was a very authentic, though digitalized harpsichord positioned in an alcove. The android woman said it had everything from Mozart to Billy Joel. But Sarah demurred, preferring to sit there by a window. Daylight, or what passed for daylight around here felt good and that 'sun' thing anchoring the center of this hollow world looked quite like the genuine article. The sky was blue, though more translucent than Earth's. She could see details and geography far away on the other side. That was a bit disorienting, but she'd get used to it.

Six hundred heartbeats later, Doctor Franklin came down. He looked at her and said - My, my, my... Then he sighed... Sarah said - What does that mean?... He said - I was picturing you in your new frocks, my dear. Quite fetching, I must say. Although I think First Empire France might be more your thing. But a delicate, floral challis with a complimentary velvetine bodice should more than suffice....

And the old reprobate would have leaned in to kiss her, had not Tomas walked in. Not that he feared the temporarily mortal vampire, but proprieties exist for a reason. So he patted her hand, sat down and called for a 'breakfast blend,' his usual morning brew. The artificial woman brought him some in a delicate, porcelain cup. He thanked her. She nodded. He sipped, savored the rich, robust flavor (meant to wake people up) and said - One for Mister Tomas, too, Martha... The artificial woman obliged. And there they were, three unusual 'human' organisms taking good English tea in a Georgian sitting room snug within a scooped out moon. They made quiet small talk, while waiting for Billy and Luna to come down. Billy'd sleep till noon if you let him and Luna was always contrary. Soon she'd ask Martha (the artificial woman), or one of the other servants to help fix her hair. Moments later, as her companions conversed, Sarah noticed Martha sitting off in a corner reading what looked like a Bible. She even mouthed prayers.... Sarah interrupted whatever it was the two gentlemen were discussing and asked - Doctor Franklin, your housekeeper, she's some sort of robot. Am I right?.... The Doctor chuckled, smiled and nodded.... Sarah continued - Her spiritual devotion. Might I ask, is it programmed or real?...... Oh, quite real, my dear girl. Martha is a pillar of her congregation. Instructs the young and everything. Wrote two hymns, if I'm right.... He turned toward the prayerful 'woman' and said - Martha, how many God songs have you penned?..... She held up a hand, indicating 'three' then went right back to her devotions.... Sarah whispered - Did you give her a soul?..... Franklin said - I did not. She got that, or rather discovered it, as soon as she wanted one. The Deity is quite liberal in that regard. Would you agree, Tomas?..... The formerly one thousand year old vampire (though with an eighteen year old body) nodded and said - The righteous of all groups shall share in The World To Come. Miss Martha is nothing more than a representative of a new group. At least that's how I see it.

Soon after, Billy and Luna came down. Those able to tolerate such fare had eggs and rashers. Then they set off in the fine coach pulled by those exquisite automoton horses through the cobbled streets of Baby Philadelphia, as the polity and it's tradesmen embarked on another day. Billy would get his suede knee britches. Tomas would be attired in trim, spare, rather clerical garb. But the ladies, the 'vampirinas' would blossom as never before (they were young vampirinas, don't forget), wrapped in the language of  a romantic age set far in advance of their nativity.

And even if the intra-lunar reality at hand was but a simulation of that time, the effect was very satisfying just the same.

Their meeting with that gentleman from the fourth dimension would come later, as would introductions to all manner of beings from an assortment of exotic and intoxicating worlds.

Selena, as the inner surface of our moon is called, is quite a sophisticated place...

<more next time>

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MORE STRANGE REALITIES FROM THE LUNAR TOWN OF BABY PHILADELPHIA ... 8/1/14

Now doctor Franklin had a townhouse in Baby Philadelphia. The place was patterned after his residence under The Anti-Enchantment Bureau, but minus the exterior vistas (holograms, since they were beneath the surface). If you're curious, google - photos of townhouse mansions in Philadelphia. The stately, red brick domicile occupied four stories. Tall, narrow, multi-paned windows let in lots of light. Floors were hand-laid walnut, burnished to a fine, rich, glow. Some of the furnishings were authentic, but most were Lunar made, though of exacting specifications. And the carpets, woven by intelligent cephalopods from another settlement planted inside the moon, equaled those wrought for the court at Versailles. Indeed, Doctor Benjamin Franklin was exceedingly fond of the house and quite proud of its comforts. 

Martha, his automoton (but in reality, more like an android) housekeeper, met them at the door. Sarah and Luna, being vampirinas and used to sniffing out mortals, knew that right away. Even Tomas recognized the difference, in his temporarily mortal form. Vampire skills and abilities die hard. There were a pair of footmen too, Jack and Walter, but they were human. Three maids, also android, kept the place spick and span. And a gardener, named Chauncey, tended the small, walled sanctuary out back.

Each was given a room. Not counting staff quarters, the residence had seven bedrooms, all with en suites and small sitting areas, unheard of in Revolutionary times, but the Doctor likes HGTV (yes, you can click on it) and is quite up on things.

The Old Patriot (Doctor Franklin) said - Tomorrow we go for our fittings. Our tailors and seamstresses are quite adept and can reproduce a wide variety of eighteenth century attire. You'll get those suede, knee britches you asked for, Billy. And Tomas will find enough linen (term for shirts) and waistcoats to please his rarefied tastes. The ladies (Sarah & Luna) will be attended to by Madame Hortense, dressmaker to the fourth or fifth Duchess of Alba. Well, not the actual woman herself. But via careful scanings of her preserved brain (she lost her head during The Reign of Terror, you know) we were able to download her essence into the engineered woman you'll meet tomorrow.... Oh! I nearly forgot. We'll also be meeting a gentleman from the fourth dimension. And please don't stare. Beings like that are very different. They wax and wane, appearing to move about the room (and sometimes beyond) without warning. You see, in their dimension, everything exists as two poles of a spinning dumbbell. Living things, inanimate things, even the very world they live on. At times he will appear to occupy space already occupied by a wall, or a pie-safe or a lady. But no harm will be done. This is not like vampiric sublimation. So don't be alarmed. We look like rigid and diminished things to him. But he tells the best jokes. You'll like him.

Tomas (somewhat lost in his own thoughts) said - Who built this place? And if vampires, well, certain ones anyway, have traveled as far as Europa and swam with the manta-ray people under the ice, how is it we never stumbled on this place? (he meant the Dyson-like 'globe' occupying the inner surface of the moon.) ... Doctor Franklin just shrugged. no one knew the answer to that, even him.

Billy asked about conditions on Earth. Sarah wanted to know too. But he pretended not to hear. Why burden them with the truth?

So they repaired to their quarters to freshen up, then met in the Louis XV dining salon for victuals suited to their own special spiritual condition and physicality.

<more next time>

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MEANWHILE BACK ON EARTH, SOMETHING LIKE CHAOS REIGNS ... 7/29/14

So, as you know, Tomas and Sarah and Luna and Billy (have we missed anyone?) fled Earth aboard Doctor Franklin's covert space craft, The Poor Richard, arriving at Baby Philadelphia, premiere human settlement in the assorted melange that is the interior surface of the moon. Tomas had a brush with a loathsome alien specimen, but other than that, it's all been honky-dory. Trouble is, back on Earth, in the other Philadelphia, it ain't so honky-dory. (any linguists know the origin of that term?.... guessing Latin?).

Tomas' dream for an all inclusive world, where paranormals and just-plain-normals (abnormals too) live together in mutually beneficial bliss and brotherhood went kaput. (THAT, I KNOW is Latin). Too many human beans ain't evolved enough for that. Hell, we still ain't solved acne, flatulence and bad-hair-days. What do you expect?

Fundamentalist hordes of all stripes quickly formed vigilantes. And they know about vampiric inability to sublimate through lead, thus the old Eastern State Penitentiary rapidly morphed into a slip shod version of seventeenth century Europe's Black Fortress (google MARIANNE IN BRITCHES by Billy Kravitz and poke around, if you want to learn about that horrific place). Heavy,lead panels were bolted to walls, creating cells impervious to vampire abilities. Thin nets of the same noxious metal hung from ceilings and walls, blocking all avenues of escape. Indeed, the vast structure itself was shrouded in a gerrymandered assemblage of lead mesh. For night-folk (vampires) there was no way out. Terrified blood drinkers,swathed in heavy chains and lead reinforced blankets, babbled away in dark, dank cells, waiting for their turn in the crematorium ( actually, crudely altered pizza ovens, since actual crematoriums were few and far between).

The paranormal world went to ground. Even the witches, both born and trained, were silent. Werewolves of all types and castes still prowled the shadows, but they're daring. They do stuff like that. If you want to know more, google WEREWOLF CASTES by Billy Kravitz. That should provide some links and, as always, scroll or poke around.

Less well known denizens of the night, like SQUATCHES, Jersey Devils and merfolk (although, strictly speaking, they manifest in daylight too) simply stole away to their woodland and oceanic hideaways. But vampires suffered the most. 

Baylah, our two hundred and fifty year old ( at least ) Beyonce lookalike hid with the mole people in their deep, deep warren of never-used, subway tunnels. Others you may know have vanished. Are they 'dead?' Is someone hiding them? Do they fight with various Armia Vampirida bands said to exist? Who knows? 

And those non-decomposing zombies they have around here (Philadelphia) are just a bunch of collaborator-shits. That 'Uber Zombie' Uther aus Ulm is the worst. Rides around in a big, black GMC Denali all tricked out with bright silver trim. Bullet proof, they say it is. Fingers paranormal types... even innocent little elferinos and elferinas... cherubs too. District Leader What's His Name gave him a big apartment, high atop one of the Society Hill Towers. Probably a penthouse, because they have private elevators. Believe me... you don't want to go up there. Got a renegade, 'born' witch helping too. Don't know her name. Folks call her Maleficent, after the Disney character. But that's all anybody knows. 

The Red Paint people (always secretive and trustworthy) operate an Underground Railway of sorts, funneling all types of beings out to The Jersey Pine Barrens, or down to The Smokies. And this stuff is spreading all over. They got Posses in Louisiana, Arizona and Houston.... San Diego too. So far most only target paranormals and paranormal sympathizers, but a lot of folks are desperate to get out of the country, or at least the blatantly infected parts. Tractor trailers barrel into Canada, but a Posse in Idaho and another in Michigan are already talking annexation, so what the hell good it that gonna do? New York is still relatively free. A lot head there. But they're starting to turn away people at the bridges and tunnels..... And don't even get me started on Russia, or Ukraine, or the Middle East, or Burma, or France. If I wasn't a disembodied, spirit narrator, I'd be running too. 

But you can't kill a ghost twice, so, so far, we're OK.

You want to get rich? Hoard cans of tuna, or Campbell's Chunky Soup. But save some for yourself.....

You're gonna need it.

<next time we go back to the moon>

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