Friday, October 5, 2012

BACK ALLEY BATTLE WITH DENTAL EQUIPMENT .... VAMPIRE GET SURPRISED

So we back in that alley. This what it like. Philly row house got bitty backyard...more like place to park trash can than gas grill (but they got them too). Folks set 'em off wit' green, wood, privacy fences. You know...mess a boards nailed up... a flimsy wall. If you dumb 'nuf a walk down a alley ('specially at night) it like a cattle chute. 'Bout as wide as one too. Got cats back there. They screamin' and fornicatin'. It like Gore Vidal's CALIGULA, but for felines. Rat stay way. That good. 

Annie itchin' a fight. She like scrapin' meat off a people. She like rippin' scalp off. Calls it 'toupee-makin'.' Edith say she got box of 'em...all dried out ones.... keep it in her sleepin' place. Play wit' 'em durin' the day.

Mafia boys hate her, 'cause she kill too many a they best fightin' dogs. I told you... I doan know what 'mafia' they from. Ev'rybody got mafia these days. They like Mardi Gras crews where I come from, or Mummer Parade bands up here.... 'cept they doan wear too many feathers.

Little bastid, vampirina gal know she headin' for a confrontation. She smell it. 'Spects that 'gorilla' gone come up after her. 'Spects she gone spin 'round and sublimate herself right through that big, thick body. Vampire can do that, you know... Shred it all up.... Meat grind it real good. She come out the other side, re-solidify herself, spin 'round and watch. Body jus' stand there a little bit. It wanna say somethin', but it can't, 'cause it look like train go through it. You know them Road Runner cartoon? Well, that what it like. She enjoy part where it splash down on cement like chili and cats come runnin' a eat it up.

But that not what happen this time. Gangsta boy got a girl friend. Girl friend work in a teef doctor office. She help him. She help him make ghost pictures a teef. You know...x-ray? So she boost somethin' outta office. Got a apron. Got a big apron. Two a them, actually. Two big, heavy, thick, lead apron..... An' ev'rybody know vampire can't sublimate theyself through lead.... Ask Marianne. Ask that elferina-vampirina gal. She tell you. Almost get herself burnt up 'cause a it.

So one 'gorilla' come up behind...and 'nother 'gorilla' run 'round block to the other end. Come at her boaf way. She not see lead apron at first. Some vampire can smell it, but Annie still too new. She think she gone be able a handle two of 'em. And she could, provided they doan have that weapon.

Annie stand there grinnin' like a demon... grinnin' like that derby hat, eyelash kid in CLOCKWORK ORANGE. She think she gone do it. She 'spects it gone be fun. She all set. She turnin'. Gorilla doan say nothin', jus' press in real close. They quiet. No cursin'... No hollerin'. Folks always yells in alley fights, but this different. 

Then she feel it. It cold. It heavy. She little. She trapped. Gorilla in a back squeeze her 'gainst gorilla in a front.... squeeze her real tight. Wrap it all 'round her. She fightin'. She spittin'. She scratchin'. But it too late. God damn lead suck up ev'rythin'. Suck up her strength. Suck up her courage. 

Gorilla in a back pull out gun. It like a twenty two. Mafia boys likes twenty two's, 'cause bullet not so big. It doan 'splode the skull none... jus' richochet 'round it there scramblin' them brains up. Regular human bean be forever dead. Vampire come back. Vampire heal up..... eventually.

He jam muzzle ' under apron right where she got her head. Then go 'pop-pop-pop.' Load her up real good. Vampirina gal go limp. Them 'mafia' boy jus' wrap her up and tote her off. Ten heartbeat later 'bout 'leven cat come out a lick it all up. Guess night-folk blood taste good to them.

Street empty now. Nobody 'round... not out front.... not in a alley.

An' Annie done got herself 'ketched.'

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1 comment:

Nephylim said...

That was mad bad sad and funny. Poor Annie. Got herself Ketched. Lets see what happens next