Saturday, August 24, 2013


They try to come into town, the lycanthro-sharks, but it's hard because they stand out. You know, vampires don't have that problem. Neither do plain, old werewolves, 'cause they can always morph back into humans...probably naked humans, but these days that ain't always so strange. And it's not like they can't hide behind a bush or a tombstone. Shark-werewolves can't do that. People start coming over. They ask a lot a questions, like 'What the hell are you?' and 'Wow! Two claspers!' (when referring to the males)... And that's gonna cost them an arm and a leg, at least. Sometimes they wait just outside the revolving door at the hospital and pick 'em off one by one. Or when they come out of FAMOUS DAVE'S BARBECUE ...already all sauced up and everything.  Manager don't like it. He tries to chase 'em away. Got like a tazer gun, but he gotta get real close and he seen what happened to the first manager, so mostly he just yells out the window and screams a lot 'bout how he gonna call the cops. Can you imagine what would happen if they threw one a them lycanthro-sharks in the holding pen? Parents comin' in to pick up their little graffiti bastids won't like it. I can tell you that.

Guess you got the picture. Them hellish crossbreeds is gettin' numerous. Don't know if normal werewolves is still jumpin' on regular shark wimmen, or if we got a stable reproducing hybridized population.

Film crew come in from DISCOVER TV. They got chomped on. 'Nother crew come in from HISTORY2 and you can see the gorey results on You-Tube. Look like @eliroth did it. Schools is closed. Nobody dare come out to a Weight-Watchers' meetin'.

Them what gotta go out take to carryin' opened up canned hams to throw at the sons a bitches, so they can run away. But mostly it just serve as an appetizer, 'cause werewolve-sharks run fast too.

Sheriff do send for help, though. Got a man from The National Aquarium in Baltimore and an' a fifteen year old kid what knows a lot 'bout aliens. Don't know who learned him, but guy on Craig's List say he real good.

Kid's from the high school formin' vigilante groups. But mostly they just set off cherry bombs and hump each other back the Tasty-Freeze, 'cause that like a tradition wit' them.

I gotta stop now, 'cause we on batteries. 'Lectric wires all chomped up. Japanese guy what manage the Beni-Hana say he got a cousin what lease us a Godzilla real cheap, only President say we can't bring no Godzilla in the country, 'cause even a tame one gonna shit all over the place. An' a crazy one gone step on too many cars.

wilkravitz ain't typin' this.... just me Some Guy From The Bayou... signing off...
see all 1,238 posts at ~>I READ TOO MUCH INTERNET CRAP .... join the fight on Twitter too at ~> @wilkravitz ....thank you and so long... 

1 comment:

John L. Harmon said...


You just beat SyFy to the punch, Billy!