Monday, March 5, 2012

These are the days of EL RANCHO TEXACO ..... Revenge

Little Davey was the first to speak. He quietly went over to Bart and whispered - Pop-pop, how come she ain't got no clothes on?.................... Bart say - She a shaman. She a magic woman. She do the Big Poo-Poo. You stay right by me, boy. You hear?........ Davey nodded. The old withered Hover-Round jockey cackled. She said - Dat what I am! Dat what I am! Do you wanna see?....... And she spit a great gob of mucus up out of  her throat. It arced over the complacent bob-cat contentedly curled upon her lap and plopped down into the dust.

Ev'ryone look. Ev'ryone wait. At first nothing happen. At first much a that noxious jelly just spread out and ooze down in a the dirt. But then she mumble somethin'. She say a few  word in Tuva-Tuva talk. And a little ripple come out from the ugly snot gobble, just like a bitsy tidal wave in the dust. It move out a little ways, then another one come out and another and another. Miz India no wanna step on 'em. So she start liftin' up her feet and puttin' 'em down real fast. Look like a little girl playin' double dutch. Then everybody else start doin' the same thing. Anybody goin' by would say - Look at that. What all them goofy Earth people doin' dancin' a I-gotta-go-pee-pee dance 'round that nekkid, ole Big Poo-Poo woman for?

But it like a instinct. They does it 'cause they has to do it. Ole nekkid woman start a laugh. She say - You them folk from the Big House, ain't yah?........ But goofy Earth people don't say nothin'. She say - You them God damn Texaco goomers. I know who you are. We all know who you are..............

Missus Buster wanna stop steppin'. She gettin' tired. You know she ain't exactly a skinny, little thing, that one. She start wheezin' - Please...Please....... But Tuva-Tuva women don't do nothin'......... Buster say - I ain't no Texaco. She ain't one a them either. We just work for 'em. Them two (points to Zeke and Missus Zeke) ain't no Texacos either..........Bart look real mad.  Jaw tighten up and ev'rythin'. But he doan say nothin'. Miss Sissie start a  go - Oh, God. Oh, God.... 'Cause she like a old lady and this more steppin' then she used to. Miss Monica's daughter (she got two. other one is a boy) start a cry. Miz India start hurlin' out them prayers. She callin' on God. She callin' on Jesus. She callin on all the Hosts a Heaven. Think I heared her name Holy Moses and Merv Griffin too. Don't know what that last one was doin' in there. But she was gettin' desperate. Tuva- Tuva woman sit still for a while. Then she get mad. Then she get real mad. Then she yell - You think your God ain't my God too!? Who care what kind a name you call him!? Who care what kind a story you tell!? You think He love you more better than he love me!?......Then why you not put that foot down and see?...............Miz India start speakin' in tongues. But one a them sound more like an ole time 'rap' album, if you ast me. And somebody on the other side a one a them tongues must a answer her. 'Cause she get this real stiff lookin' resolute 'spression on her face and she do it. She does. She stamp that big, ole 'Trooper' gal foot a hers right down in the dirt...right on top a one them little dust tsunamis.......... And you know what happen?.....Nothin'. They jus' keep comin', but nothin' happen. Oh, them what does not jump get bity, little drifts 'round they shoes. That's all. An' after a few heartbeats them little dust ripples stop all together. Just die down and disappear.

Ev'rybody jus' stand there like bunch a stoopid dopes, even them nice, little kids. Miss Sissie catch her breath. Missus Buster cough a few time, but then she all right. Peed a little bit. But her pants is black, so it doan show.

Old, nekkid, Big Poo-Poo woman start laughin' and laughin'. She say - I do like to make God damn Earth folk dance so! That one a my favorite thing........... Miss Sissie say - You should be ashame a yourself.......Old nekkid, orange skin thing say - Oh, I am, but that doan mean I do not like it.

Then she start speedin' 'way in her ratty, ole Hover-Round. Cat jump off her lap. But it run off with her. She yell - Y'all better start steppin' this way. Y'all better come wit' me. Them what wanna live, anyway.

Miz India was first one a hurry off. But like two heartbeat later ev'rybody else decide a do the same. I do not know where she takin' 'em. Look like they snakin' through little break in them hills, or maybe right in a them hills. From my 'vantage point it hard to tell.

What I do know is little bit later three bee-bops zip down and whole bunch a Chinese goomers jump out....right where they was too...them Texacos, I mean.

Ole, nekkid woman save 'em...But from what and for how long, I cannot say...


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