Thursday, March 20, 2014

The 'Born' Witch, PIG BLOOD ANNIE Confronts The Vampires ... 3/19/14

The well dressed thirty five-ish 'yuppie' woman sat in the booth and sniffed. Not a big sniff, just a small inhalation. Most would never notice. But she tasted the ether in order to learn certain things. Snakes do that. 'Born' witches do too. And the outward appearance of the person in the booth was only a powerfully crafted disguise.... a manipulation of the skin and flesh and bone. Hair, eyes and clothes were easy. I suppose the nails were too. 

The waitress brought her food, chicken fried steak and mashed tatters. Menu said 'country' fried steak, but that's because owner thinks city people won't know. Might not realize it has steak in it. Not fancy steak like they give you at Lone Star or Out Back, more like thin sliced sandwich steaks. This is Center City, Philly after all. But the cook was from North Carolina and he scrunched it up and battered it real good. She got a whole big plate. Lumpy, home-style tatters too, with little bit a fried onions mashed in. Lady in booth don't want no gravy. That way she can spoon her corn on top and mix it all up. Got it with 'Texas' Toast too. Now you know how diner places feed you big portion, so you take some home and feel like they give you lot for your money. Most folks do that and have a real nice lunch the next day. But Pig Blood Annie eat the whole thing. She cut it up with them shiny, heavy, restaurant, stainless steel food stickers they give her and shovel it in... all hot and good and salty. Batter crunch up real good too. (laughs) Bet lot a folks gone run out and get chicken fried steak, if they can find it. Maybe now. Maybe tomorrow. Mister Never You Mind (me) be narratin' this tonight. And 'fore I made into a disembodied spirit (and sometime narrator) I like a big, old plate a that stuff. Burn me up like chicken fried steak too... oil, or kerosene or somethin'.  Tie me to a metal chair an' light it right up. Do it in a cement floored loft buildin'... factory place, 'cause they don't want no big fire, just enough to get rid a me. Lucky I can't remember it none. Well, actually, I do remember it... just make like I can't, 'cause that way it would be better. You see, when dead folk think 'bout somethin', we think it up real good an' it like touchin' a red hot iron, only not for no second. Can't pull your hand away. An' it all over your body. Them what read this know that.... Look, lemme tell you 'bout somethin' else, 'cause I would lay money you do not know what it feel like when you scrotum in flames.

Case you forgot, lady eatin' that big plate a food, Pig Blood Annie. She drink a lot a sweet tea too. Sugar can't do nothin' to no witch. She smell Boopsie too. That her little grandbaby. She also a 'born' witch. Know how to fly and all, though she do still pee the bed. If you look at Pig Blood now, you think it Laura Linney , pretty, skinny, blond haired lady what tell you when Downton Abbey 'bout a start. I know that 'cause them vampires watch it. They quiet now. Feel sad 'cause Conrad dead. Do not know if he a ghost yet. Nobody tell you that. You gotta see. When folks die they say - You wan' be ghost?... 'Cause they got write that stuff down. Some go - F*ck yeah, I wan' be ghost.... An' that's it. They ghost, til they sick of it an' go - Calgon take me away!... Then Calgon come an' take 'em away. Hope it the good Calgon, if you know what I mean. 

Pig Blood Laura Linney all done know. Wipe her face real good wit' the napkin. Rub it all over her lips. If it not witch trick, lipstick be all scraped off, but face color more or less permanent , 'cause she like it that way. Least til she 'crack' into somethin' else.

Then she give cash register woman money an' scram. Leave waitress five hundred dollar tip. Got some bastid name William McKinley on one side and five hundred dollar in old fashion writin' on back. I not know if he a president, or a school principal, or guy what make cough drop. But he on it. Who the hell care? I hope his dead mother happy.

Waitress not know, but next time she whip it out an show somebody, next time she go - Look what I got! Look what I got! I got five hundred dollar bill! I got five hundred dollar bill!... it gone go pffft an' be a use rubber.

'Born' witch walkin' toward townhouse now. She not wanna make no scene out on street. So she go 'crack' an' make herself in a nice, shiny, two inch long, cockroach. But a lady cockroach, 'cause she not funny that way. Sneak in through tight, little space under back door. House in good repair, but you know how it is.

Critter-killin'-guy leave gel crap for real cockroach, but 'born' witch not no real cockroach, so she OK. Although she do shit all over the kitchen jus' for spite. That what happen when you eat a big meal. 

Vampires all sleepin.' Edith sleepin.' Billy sleepin.' I not need him. Mister Never You Mind make keys dance all by hisself. I see that big, witchy cockroach run out the kitchen an' go upstairs... run up a riser... run up a tread... run up a riser... run up a tread.... She like a athlete. She like a regular, cockroach athlete. She gone get herself in where Tomas an' Sarah sleepin.' I know, 'cause light from screen show it all. An' what I not see, I know. 'Cause I got power too. Actually, y'all got power. Jus' gotta figure it out.

Somebody gone wake up with big, old, angry, 'born' witch virago settin' on they chest....

An' they not gone be too happy.....

Now, permit this Francophone, creole gentleman to percolate hisself out a here....

'Cause I gotta go haunt someplace else.

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Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Vampirino, Tomas Does His Best But Somebody Dies Tonight... 3/18/14

Tomas gets very protective at times like this. He told Billy to hide. He told him to leave. They know what's coming. Elferinos and elferinas going too. I don't know where they're hiding. Why should I? Disembodied spirits feel things, but we don't know everything. Thought can be locked up too. There's so much you don't know. 

This is Zebulon... and I know death. Thirteen I was when they stoned me. But that was almost twenty one hundred years ago and I've seen multitudes drift up like smoke since then. So I'll narrate this flight. Welcome aboard. And fasten your seat belts. It's gonna be a bloody night. 

Billy's with Baylah. I can tell you that. Got a Saint Patrick's Day thing at  her Piano Bar. Guy at the keyboard sings Galloway by Broadway, the score from Finian's Rainbow, Dancing At Lunessa , Philadelphia Here I Come, even Brigadoon. That's Scottish, but still Celtic, so close enough. think he even plays the score from The quiet Man. 

Waitress gives Billy a Guinness. Who doesn't like that? We had all kinds of ales and dark beers in my time too. The Egyptians had a lot of beer recipes. Shipped it all over. They had it in Rome. We had it in Judea... in Jerusalem and Ceasaria Maritima, up by The Sea of Harps, what you call the Galilee, where the bards came from. Now they think beer has to come from some place that has them cuckoo clocks and oompah bands, or places like them. But you believe what you want. I've not come to cure your ignorance. What's fixing to unfold tonight scares me. Not so much scares me, as makes me sad. Oh, there's an after. There's a world to come... a what will be. I know that. I've climbed Jacob's ladder too. But there's so much you still waste. And that includes night-folk and 'magic' souls too. 

Conrad hasn't left his dark chamber. Actually, that's just a snug, little bedroom with secure shades and shutters where he can escape the light. That's what they have in the townhouse. Sometimes they lay out a few in the basement too. The 'ghost' of the polio kid who frequents the place likes it. He likes company. You know how it is.

But Conrad's scared. I think he's more than scared. I think there're grades of being scared. First you're concerned (a little tickle). Then you're afraid(an itch). Next comes scared (a rash)... terrified ( a fiery oozing eruption)... horrified(lava)... I don't know where it stops. You get the picture. My God, how many pictures this age has. You're never free of them... Books, screens, photographs, paintings, sketches... Like a tattooed Pictish tribesman without a clear spot left. Do you ever look at the stars? Can you still see them?... Or the faces of real people and not just colorful shadows 'on line?' I don't think you do.  And that goes for you vampires too. Oh, you hate that word. But I don't care.

Conrad's dying, or diffusing, or dissolving, or whatever it is night-folk do. They should have let him be. Some people are not meant for this. Some see the scarab as a living jewel. Others see only a dung beetle. Quite deep for one only thirteen years in the flesh. But the soul learns more than the body ever will. 

Doctor Franklin called. There's trouble over there, at his compound, I mean. Oh, the Grand Armonica's not broken. It's just not working right. He tried to expand and contract a goat. Sometimes harmonics can do that. But the goat died.  Diffused it out into the large room like a cloud.... a nebulous aze (Hebrew word for goat) like smell and nothing more. But the trouble started when they brought it back, when they drew it in. The process wouldn't stop. The creature began to bleat.. to scream.  The particles of it's being sliced into each other... blood and water and bile and lymph ran from its thrashing body like a sponge. When it was over nothing was left but a small, dry brittle 'figurine'... like a primitive clay fired image. The colors looked painted on. Doctor Franklin told Tomas all about it. So they let Conrad be and prepared him for the end. 

Now the only ones home, besides Conrad and Tomas were Leo and Edith. She tried her best to make him comfortable with her witchy-woman, pow-wow magic, but death-stopping she cannot do. Leo himself is new to the night, though naturally instinctive about these things and guilty over his part in it {see the previous post... click OLDER POST at bottom} . He cried. He prayed. Faith doesn't die. Night-folk believe what they've always believed. If you follow this you know that. Look at Tomas... Tomas de Macabea also known as Jonathon ben Macabi. 

So they carefully bore him up to the roof, back from the street, where none could see, and laid him down on an old feather bed. Better be done with it before the 'born' witch came, 'cause they could feel her approach and the air grew charged around them. Soon he began to talk about his family, his mortal family, I mean. He spoke of dinners and holidays and plain things too. Then he could speak no more. Edith whispered - He looks bigger. He looks... ghostly. Not pale, but I can see the blanket through his hand.... and then she said nothing, but tears ran down her face. It was cold up there. The night-folk didn't care, but Edith was mortal, so Tomas hugged her and told her to go inside. There was a doorway up there, not full height, maybe five feet high. you had to bend down a bit and step into it. Remember, the townhouse dates from colonial times. So she nodded and went in. Tomas wished Sarah was there, but she was gone too. Not to Baylah's, with Billy. She's probably walking the streets doing good deeds. That's how she is. Oh, I don't mean she won't kill somebody when she has to, but she knows the difference... 'Let the righteous live. Let the wicked die.'..... Night-folk have prayers too.

Then Tomas and Leo uncovered him, as his body began to expand. Any mortals on the street about at such an hour would have seen but a strange, rising mist. Though the two vampirinos had sharper eyes and they could see it all. Conrad's physical form was disassembling. His molecules went back to God. I can say that. That's how it looked to me. Tomas recited the old Kaddish prayer... the prayer for the dead. More a 'My God is near. I know not fear' recitation than a petition for the peaceful repose of the soul. He knew God would do that. Leo stood there quietly humming something. I think it was an old hymn--- Joy, Joy,Joy, Joy Down In My Heart.

And so two night-folk... two vampires, if you will, kept vigil with another on his way... A 'Rite of Spain' (Sephardic) thousand year old Jew and a maybe three year old, somewhat lapsed Protestant.

When Conrad was gone, they rolled up the feather bed and went back in. Edith gave them hot tea.

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Monday, March 17, 2014

THE EVIL ELFERINO, PETER senses the 'Born' Witch's Approach and Hides... 3/17/14

He took the baby and left. The other elferinos and elferinas were free now. No force kept them in the never used mausoleum. So they regretted their superficial infatuation with the powerful one and flew back to the townhouse. Tomas was watching television when they arrived, a film version of Edith Wharton's House of Mirth. He likes old stories... great families in great houses, because they recall his mortal days in Old Spain. Look how he sits in the chair like a throne. 

The juvenile, elf-like vampires didn't say a word. Edith served hot tea and they drank it gratefully. Tomas said - So, where's your fearless leader?.... But none of them looked up. Even though they're rich in years their minds are still so childlike. Tomas himself would have been the same had he been transformed a few years earlier. 

None of the vampires went out. Conrad was 'sick.' Yes, night-folk suffer certain maladies too. And the really very new vampirino was scared. He had a sublimation incongruency Relatively inexperienced vampires get that. Leo and he were out gallivanting. Well, Leo was gallivanting. Conrad was merely along for the ride. They were at a certain place, a so called 'gentlemen's club' up in The Northern Liberties, just west of Old City. Twenty dollar martinis. Thirty nine dollar steak sandwiches. And quasi-poxied bitches hiding prostitution behind the screen of not-quite prostitution.  Leo does like his lap dances. You know what they do in those places? They keep the thermostat turned down low. Oh, not just to save money, although they're into that. But they do it as a sort of special effect. Refines the nipples and all. Pole dancers actually like it. Makes them so very much more enticing. Wakes everybody up a little. Cold gentlemen appreciate repeated lap dances even more.

Leo preferred one of the banquettes in the corner. A little darker there. A bit more private. Oh, he could have arranged for a completely secluded space, off in the back, or up on the mezzanine. But he enjoyed the spectacle of it all. Two of the girls would sit with him after. How comfy they were, I can't say.  A g-string stuffed with crisp, new five dollar bills gotta pinch a little bit. Still, they stayed. And he kissed them. Was that against the rules. Well, yes. But rules were just for the books, or when policemen were about.... on-duty policemen, I mean.  The trouble started when one of the girls left and the other suggested they go upstairs. Conrad wanted to stay where he was. But the nearly bare girl looked up and grinned and Leo said - No, come with us. You can watch.....So he did. Conrad hated being alone in such places. 

The rooms on the mezzanine were small easy to clean spaces with cheap, vinyl floors and plastic laminate furniture suited to a 'better' college dormitory. The small lamps had a weak, blue, almost neon glow, like a hospital room late at night. And according to the sounds leaking in from next door, the neighbors seemed to be enjoying a rather intimate, full contact lap dance.

Leo said - How much for the scanties?... The girl said- Sixty two dollars for the top and twenty six for the 'lady patch.'.... So he broke the strings that held them in place, tossed her some bills and said - Here's enough for two.... She scooped up the cash and put it aside. Then she said - Two hundred dollar table fee for the room..... Leo gave her the money, which went into the slot on the small, lock box mounted on the wall. But the only table was a small one topped with a warm eight dollar bottle of wine and maybe three or four inverted, clear, plastic 'old fashioned' cups. 

Conrad sat on a hard stack chair, straight out of a mall food court, while the other two had their fun on a wide, black, velveteen, tufted chaise lounge. I hope they sprayed it for bugs. She didn't seem bitten up and he was a vampire, after all, so I presume it was alright.... Every so often the girl grinned at him. Sometimes Leo gave him a look. Conrad didn't like it. He just stared. 

But vampires can get rough and Leo was foolhardy. That, coupled with the cheapness of the furnishings probably caused it all. I mean it happened so fast. The chaise lounge snapped. It broke, just like a thick branch... cracked from side to side. The upholstery ripped and everything. BAM! The bottom half crashed down on the floor. The top half canted back and the girl's spine snapped right along with it.

She gasped. Her eyelids fluttered. She tried to scream, or say something. Leo went - Jesus Christ!... and jumped off her. The table with the cheap wine fell over. But the bottle didn't break. It just rolled toward the wall. ... Leo grabbed her and picked her up. Her legs were dead. She couldn't stand on her own. He bit her. He tried to take the blood. He tried to draw it out. That way, at least, she'd disappear in a 'cold' blue flame and they'd be done with her. But it was too late. She was already gone, so he dropped her and grabbed a more or less in shock Conrad (new vampires can still be so human. after all) and whispered - Come on! We have to get out of here, .... as he rose through the ceiling and up to the rooftop, where they raced away, leaping from one block to the next. But Conrad wasn't ready and he began to solidify while not completely free of the tar-paper surface. Thus the sublimation problem. The atoms of his body were not quite reattached. He looked normal, to mortal eyes, but the pain was unendurable and he lay in his sleep chamber like a baby.

Tomas called Doctor Franklin. He said he'd try something but needed time to ready his equipment. Meanwhile they gave him wine. Vampires like wine. And even though Conrad wasn't much of a drinker he took it and fell asleep.

Now we planned to tell you about the elferino, Peter, tonight and how he ran away with the baby (Boopsie) at the approach of her witch-virago grandmother. But then this happened. Look, if you've been with us a while, you know it isn't fiction. We're just forced to pretend it is. And it would have been better had the vampires all gone out and scattered for the darktime. For a full 'assembly' of night-folk give off quite an aura. But they didn't and a powerful 'born' witch like Pig Blood Annie can certainly feel it. In fact, she's headed for the townhouse right now. I don't know where her runty, 'worm' (non-witch) husband, Little Joe is, but what the hell can he do?

God, you know? I wish this was fiction... Let me go find someplace to hide... Billy ( who types up this stuff) signing off.

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Sunday, March 16, 2014

VIRAGO 'BORN' WITCH - PIG BLOOD ANNIE crosses into Philadelphia ... 3/16/14

She crossed over the bridge. Pig Blood Annie made her way along the pedestrian catwalk, a big-boned, over weight Piney woman in a house dress and flip-flops. Some drivers looked. Smart ass kids honked at her. They yelled stuff. But she didn't care. Witch don't feel no cold. Witch don't care what 'worms' do. That's what they call regular folk what can't conjure shit. 'Worms'... We are worms to them. And they squish us and cut us and burn us and hook us just because they can. 

Pig Blood (what friends call her) stepped down off the Benjamin Franklin Bridge into Old City, right by the huge, more or less modern, lightning bolt sculpture meant to mark the spot where Franklin flew the kite. Man, if them 'worms' knew that old reprobate was still living they'd put him on the @SyFy network or like THE ELLEN SHOW and he'd love it, the old son-of-a-bitch. But Old City's filled with bars and clubs. Cars zoomin' by. Hateful, twenty-something yuppies (and that includes thirty-somethings too) throwin' keys to slick valet-boys who care for them Beemers like they care for your grandmother. Narrow cobbled streets full a cops and tourists... architecturally 'integrated' condos and art galleries... fistfights too, after the bars close. 

Cop starts givin' Pig Blood the eye. Think's she's a drunk. Who else would walk around like that? She see's him and feels like playin' a little. Don't get into Philadelphia much, so what the hell? Goes down an alley behind some shops. Tight little place big enough for trash cans, recycling bins, winos what gotta take a piss, grease, mold and ashes. Gets dark real fast too. Fifteen feet in and light from the street looks like a distant doorway. Storekeepers 'sposed a put up security fixtures and they do... just don't turn 'em on. Got these real heavy, thick, metal anti-break-in doors. Nobody gone through them. Only open them once or twice a week to put trash out... no garbage, just trash. So, you know. Witch goes in real deep. Has to squeeze her ass passed all them bins. Cop gets off his bike, pushes it into the dark. so nobody take it. Clicks on flashlight. You know how they hold it? Like a bottle. Like shining light out the bottom of a bottle. He a kid-cop. Twenty eight, thirty two. Can't be no more than that. Light bouncin' 'round like outta scary movie. First here, then there... Old bricks... Sexy-curse-words... dead cat... what look like a human turd... Could be like from a chimpanzee or a gorilla. But ain't never heared a no gorilla or chimp walkin' 'round down here, 'less they do it incognito. Cop hear laughin'... quiet, wheezin' laughin'.... He stop, raise up light an' go - Ma'am, you alright?.... Just hear laughin'.... Light see big, meaty shoulder, thick strap from old house dress, little tattoo... Maybe jus' a bug? I don't know.,.. Light see her face... little chin... big, ole cheeks... l'il piggy eyes.... Oh, yeah, forgot the fat nose..... Cop go - What you doin' lady? Ain't you cold?.... But witch-woman doan say nothin'. Jus' make like she laughin' only nothin' come out. ... Cop get little bit too close. She look like old neighbor lady what once half kill two husbands, so he feel bad... Can't do that 'round no witch, 'specially this one, 'cause she got like a Medusa app. She look at him an' he just stand there. Flashlight fall, clatter on cement. It roll somewhere, but I don't know where. Pig Blood pick up her beefy hands and grab his arms, right below the shoulders. Young cop sob a little, but that all he do. Then she lift him up off his feet, open malf real wide... like a sea lamprey. It stretch real big, grotesque and terrible. Teeth gone all the way around. Don't stop for nothin'. Tongue dancin' back and forth like a big, fat, moray eel. 

First the head go in. He shakin'. He sweatin'. He tremblin' real bad, but that's all he do...Tongue all over it. Lick him all over. Cop's glasses dissolve. That the magic part. Shoulders go in. Clothes dissolve too. He got badges, leather and all, but it disappear jus' like that. He moan. He go - No. No. no.... Cry and all. Think about his baby. Think about his wife. Think about his mama... his brother... his papa. Head down in witch's belly by now. Neck stretch real wide. Inside a whole lot bigger than outside, 'cause she got the magic an' all. Hips go in. Legs go in. Then, jus' for fancy, she bite the feet off. He stuck inside a tight, hot, heavy, wet, acid, burning sack. Feel dark, stifling guts pressin' in all 'round him. He gone die. Innocent, young, cop boy gone die. Gone take a while, but he will.

From outside, Pig Blood Annie just a big, sloppy thing again. But she fix that. start changin' 'fore she leave that alley. Body slim down. Arms get skinny. Wattle go bye-bye. Toes get clean. Chankles go where the bad chankles go. An' she back out on the street. Face all smooth and wonderful. Teeth look clean an' nice. Got nice clothes. Fresh underwear an' all. Don't stink none. 

Jus' another bastid yuppie-gal walking down Yuppie Street in the middle a Yuppie Town, 'cept this one got a still not dead, cop boy in her belly.

Ooooh! Look how pretty her pocketbook is.....

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Friday, March 14, 2014

The 'Born Witch' PIG BLOOD ANNIE Just Doesn't care... 3/14/14

Real witches, powerful witches don't like bein' played with. And that includes in a physical manner 'less they callin' the shots. So you don't mess with them. You say - Yes, ma'am... and you say - No, ma'am... and You want me to get you a nice cold iced tea, or maybe hold some shit-ass down so you can stomp on they belly?..... Then best run away an' hide, 'lest she start lookin' at you.

Sometime they shrink people down, like to a sardine and mash 'em up with mayonnaise for like a sam'itch. I seen one itty-bitty-ize a snot-nosed kid and shove him down the neck of a coke bottle. Then she pour throw-up and maggots in it (I think it her throw-up, but I do not know who the rightful owner a them maggots is), shake it up real good, til everybody start dancin'. Snot-nosed kid go completely dead soon, 'cause he got low throw-up tolerance. That like a medical thing. Witch not thoughtless, though. She do send like a video to snot-nose mama. She cry and cry and cry. Witch feel bad, so she give snot-nose mama year supply a Tasty Kake chocolate cupcakes. That way she not cry so much. 

Now you know I talkin' 'bout 'born witches.'  They not gotta learn nothin.' Got the hoo-doo stuffed inside they bones. You know that little bone you got right up top you heinnie? What doctahs call - the tailbone? What nasty son-a-bitch call 'the coccyx?'  That where it is. That where all the magic go. That way you jus' pop a fart an' BOOM, magic time!

Pig Blood Annie want her grandbaby real bad. She gone hug it and kiss it and make french toast (outta mostly real French people). She gone make nice, little, spinnin', flyin' thing for over it bed. But that not magic. She jus' knot fishin' line round baby bat feet an' let 'em go. Hope grandbaby like guano.  Right now she stompin' down county road 561 in Jersey.  Can't miss it. She the big, WOW-size, mama in flip-flop and house dress.  Like Jabba-Hut got a sistah.... a big mean white lady sistah who 'splode all the folks gettin' off bus wit' a fart 'cause she feel like. I do like how she wear her hair, though.

Little Joe, her skinny, dirty husband know she comin'. He got like a tickle feeling. Edith say it jus' impetigo, 'cause she not gonna want him get juiced up. He ask Edith if she gone feed him filet 'cause Baylah give him one last night. She say  - No, you gone get corned beef sam'itch and split pea soup.... Little Joe smack his lips. Piece a spit fly right in a Sarah's malf. She just sittin' there drawin' backward mermaids wit' a Sharpie. Them mermaids what got fish from waist up an' bare, naked lady parts from waist down. No arms, jus' fancy fins. Wear high heel too, 'cause that make it more artistic..... Sarah go - Ewww, you dirty, son-a-bitch.... Then she gargle Clorox from under sink, 'cause she a vampire and it not gonna hurt her.

Pig Blood Annie chase a stuck-up dog breedin' lady outta her house, 'cause she hungry an' wanna chomp on all them puppies. Puppy-daddy doan care, 'cause she give him two hundred dollah. Puppy-mama pregnant for life, so you know she one crazy bitch.

Pig Blood reach in cage, grab little puppy, turn 'round (so other puppy doan know), open her malf real wide, like she a Monty Python cartoon, or picture from Alice In Wonderland book and suck it right down. Then she belch an' do it again. 

Stuck-up dog breedin' lady husband clap every time and go - Wheeeee!.. 'cause he like people what can do tricks.

Tomorrow she gone cross over Benjamin Franklin Bridge an' be in Philly... Would a been here earlier, but had a go back 'cause she left someone burnin'...

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Thursday, March 13, 2014

Idina Menzel - No Day But Today - Los Angeles, October 22, 2011 (HD) ..and NO NIGHT BUT TONIGHT... a rainy vampire evening .. 3/12/14











A rainy night. No fancy script, just plain letters. They are not here. Tomas and his Sarah are out, bundled against the cold hard wind, two silent, abiding souls walking through the wet, shinny streets. Boopsie is still lost. Little Joe, the rough, knotty witch-husband from The Pines claims he looks for her, his dear, tiny, step granddaughter. I suppose he does. But he's off with Baylah now, all bathed and dressed in city clothes, seated at a snug warm table in her piano-bar jewel-box appreciating a sizzling filet and the dulcet tones of an accomplished Michael Feinstein impersonator. And although his missus, hoch-witch, Pig Blood Annie, pines for her little dumpling, he doesn't care. The city has magic of it's own. 


Our two night-stars, Tomas and Sarah, pass The Old State House, also known as Independence Hall. How dark and red the brick sidewalks look in the rain. Ghosts peek through the multi-pane windows. So far as I see, no one special. Not the great Jefferson, nor the vociferous Addams, but some mean little clerks charged with writing it all down. Such dedication. Still on duty after all these years. 


I am an unnamed narrator. We haven't met. My appellation is immaterial to these events. I crave not glory like Mister Never You Mind, or Johannon. Sometimes I forget how I'm even called. But the night-folk of this place, these Philadelphia vampires are special to me and have been for centuries. And if I had to tell you why, I could not, for that would ruin the truth of it.


They've already had their meal. Tomas and Sarah, I mean... A dark soul, taken in what used to be an old cloak room off the small, paneled lobby of a Washington Square West, gilded age apartment house, for him. And a street hood with blood on his knife for her. Tomas tipped the doorman twenty dollars to vacuum up the ashy residue (after the cold blue flesh consuming flames died down). The man was a sometime 'familiar,' so that made it alright. Sarah avoided that complication, since her soul died in an alley. They are good, these night-folk and I love them. 


She (Sarah) had jewels on every finger, fine 'dinner rings' from the twenties and earlier, Edwardian baubles too, taken from their coffers. Each meant as a gift for the poor. One went to a sad faced woman pricing bread and eggs in a small bodega. Just slipped it in her pocket and disappeared. Another helped ease the pain of single father, recently fired, with two, little girls. That's how it was. Tomas had three watches, two on his right wrist and another on his left. Any one would fetch three or four thousand in the worst 'we buy gold and diamonds' joint. Soon each will be gone. People call them angels. You know, they have this 'look' in their eyes, a more than mortal 'gleam' I suppose you might call it. So, in a practical sense, they are 'angels...


Sarah wants to go look for Boopsie. Tomas does too, but he's afraid of what he might find. Does he know all the details of Peter's years in Europe and his time in Istanbul?... No, he doesn't... But he feels things. 


Then they dry themselves off in the glass entryway to a little diner. He has a bowl of hot, chicken and matzoh ball soup and a steaming mug of tea. Sarah orders the same thing. They're adept at mashing the dumpling (for that's what a matzoh ball is) into teeny tiny bits after finishing the soup, so it looks like they ate half. A few other souls are seated around the place, warming up after the cold dash over. There's an all-night drug and sundry store across the street. These days 'sundry' store's almost like a Sears Catalog (do they still publish that?) . Got everything from shampoo to handy, little, light-weight power saws and clean, bright, tightie-whities. Sarah and Tomas buy magazines. She likes thick, heavy glossies from when her mortal self used to own the all-night book-shop , Philadelphia After Dark. He likes science, history, GQ and This Old House. Oh, yeah, aroma candles... they always pick up a few of them. I think they bought a Seek And Find word puzzle book for Edith and a Start Prize Tomato Plants On Your Own Window Sill kit for Conrad and Leo. As vampires, they won't eat the tomatoes. But those two always do crazy things like that. Maybe Leo wants to throw them at a bus? Conrad saw a thing on TV about botany, so he's Luther Burbank now. 


Look, Sarah's only been night-folk for maybe three years, but he's 'walked the shadows' for centuries. And this is how they spend their evenings..... murders, give-aways, chicken soup and shopping at the CVS.....



Sarah wants to 'on demand' an Idina Menzel special when they get home.  If you like, you can cue the video up above and join them. Good video too. If you want more (and you will) subscribe to the great Hayley Hanson on You Tube.


Oh, Pig Blood Annie's been snoopin' around town. That ought to juice things up.....


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Tuesday, March 11, 2014

INT. HORROR SCRIPT - NIGHT: Hostel by Eli Roth... if you want it, here it is. come and get it. but you better hurry 'cause they're bleedin' fast... 3/11/14

INT. HORROR SCRIPT - NIGHT: Hostel by Eli Roth: Genre: Horror- Torture Porn Premise: Three backpackers head to a Slovak city that promises to meet their hedonistic expectations, with no... OK, so now you gotta dip into fearthecrypt.com and @fearthecrypt on TWITTER plus@craig_mack and @eliroth One stop chopping!



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