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Bingo Boy - post 18
I don't always announce my self, but it's me, Mister Never-You-Mind. You know what it means to miss New Orleans? Well, I do. That where I been, but I'm back. So allow me to speechify 'bout what gone on now.
Ricky and Little Chrissie out for breakfast. As a disembodied spirit, I am not always plugged into the same 'time continuim' as you. But still, I'd say we livin' in the next day after the 'almost' killin'. Look like he gonna do it there for a minute too. I thought so. Had me a bet with old time funny lady, Martha Raye. But I lost. That why she gone be squattin' inside the body of a contestant on The Donald Trump Show and I here tellin' you this.
They eatin' fas' food. In New Orleans we call that stuff projectile vomit. You know, that a creole phrase. But it hot and it greasy an' they doan know no better, so that jus' how it is. Place look like a Starbuck in a concentration camp. Got half way decent paper on a walls, but kids keep pickin' on it and pickin' on it. But what I know? Maybe that the 'weathered' look?
Little Chrissie chewin' on pancake. She say - Clients from the Pennsylvania Railroad, the big banks, the big hospitals... everybody... She was the top dominatrix in town........ Ricky goes - What do you mean 'was'? She's retired now, right?..... Little Chrissie goes - No, she ain't retired. Just not the top one anymore. She still workin'...... Ricky shoot her back a wide-eyed nod. But he do find it hard to believe...... And Little Chrissie say - Good thing we still got the cage. Almost sold it for scrap, you know. Iron worth money. And I know how to handle it. You know what Marty give us? Can't jus' put it in a bank, 'cause they gone say - Where you get all them Benjamins? But if you break it up, four thousand here, two thousand there, you can get 'way wit' it. Ten thousand no. Ten thousand too big. So we gone be hittin' lot a banks. Buy some stock too, 'cause bank don't pay you shit. God, now I wish Romney won. You know that? Cindy Lauper right. Money changes everything.
Speakin' a money, now they back at work. They at the bingo hall. They in the back. They countin' bills, makin' stacks. Kids like rotatin' back here, 'cause they not in all that cigarette stink. Ricky an' Little Chrissie at the table. Big Chrissie stand by desk. She talkin' a Marty. She do sex him up every now an' then, but that doan mean she like him. Don't hate him. Just doan care.
Marty say - Here. Jimmy leave this for you. He say you take this til he (eyes Ricky) get back....... Big Chrissie look at what he sliddin' on desk. It a envelope. It a big, fat envelope. She go - Oh, how much do it got?....... Marty say - I doan know. He not say....... Big Chrissie go - When he gettin' back?........ Marty go - I doan know. He not say.... Ricky look at Little Chrissie. She look at him..... Big Chrissie go - Humph....... Guess she all mixed up, 'cause Jimmy like a uncle to her. You know he like a play wit' ole Nazi antique shit wit' her granddad. Sometime it look like Hogan's Heroes down that basement. It like Satan's Toy Box. I tell you that.... Marty go - You know how funny Jimmy get. Nobody figure him out. I think he gotta see a couple guys in the old country. An' the less I know 'bout his bidniss in the old country, the better off I am. An' less you know, better off you are too...
So she jus' grab that envelope and stuff it down her pants........ Marty look at Ricky. You know he 'spects there a body somewhere? Ricky look back. But his face doan say nothin'. His face real good at keepin' quiet...... And that how it go. Muscles out front ticklin' up the ole ladies. Jimmy gone. Ukrainian kids not here no more. Life is good.
Now we back in the cellar. Little Chrissie grandma cellar. Ain't got no window. Could be day. Could be night. How he gonna know? Jimmy not know. Place only got one bulb. Everythin' yellow and dark and dim..... Jimmy start a wake up. He gettin' squirmy. Got one eye open. Start moanin'. Mus' pain him havin' boaf his arm chained up like that...... Marge (she the grandma) look in through them bars. She got on tight, black knee pants, like she doin' yogurt or somethin'. She got a sweat shirt what say - WORLD'S BEST GRANDMA, but I doan know if it true or not.....
Jimmy got boaf a his eyes open now. He look at her. She point to tray what on like a ole card table an' she say - I got borscht. Don't know if it 'sposed a be hot or cold. I got a big hunk a 'babkah' cake. I got some kind greasy salami. Doan know if it pork or squid or goat or what. Could be cock roach. How the hell am I 'sposed a know? An' I got some ice cold sour cream too. What you want? Take your pick.... Jimmy try to move his chained up arms. He go - Where am I?......... She go - I can't tell you.... He go - What this place is?..... She go - I can't tell you..... He go - What the hell are you?..... She go - I not gonna tell you.....
Jimmy start a scream and holler. He go - HELP! HELP! HELP!.... Marge doan say nothin, jus' reach in a pocket an' pull out pepper spray. She go over an' give him a little shot. He couch. He spit. He squint up boaf eyes real tight. He sputter...... She go - You like that?.... But he still wanna holler. So Marge hold up the pepper spray. She go - What I gotta do? Give you some more?..... That make him change his mind. He shut up and stay shut up til he catch his breath and start breathin' right....... Marge go - Hey, ole man, you hungry?....... Jimmy jus' nod....... Marge say - OK, I gone unlock them bars and come on in there. But I gone leave key out here on the table. So if you try an' get me wit' your legs or somethin'... like if you choke me wit' them thighs, you jus' be layin' there wit' a decomposin' ole lady on top a you.... You want that?....... Jimmy doan say nothin'. He jus' look.
So she unlock the door, take the tray and go in. It gone be like a lunch date.... almost...
_____________________________________________
I don't always announce my self, but it's me, Mister Never-You-Mind. You know what it means to miss New Orleans? Well, I do. That where I been, but I'm back. So allow me to speechify 'bout what gone on now.
Ricky and Little Chrissie out for breakfast. As a disembodied spirit, I am not always plugged into the same 'time continuim' as you. But still, I'd say we livin' in the next day after the 'almost' killin'. Look like he gonna do it there for a minute too. I thought so. Had me a bet with old time funny lady, Martha Raye. But I lost. That why she gone be squattin' inside the body of a contestant on The Donald Trump Show and I here tellin' you this.
They eatin' fas' food. In New Orleans we call that stuff projectile vomit. You know, that a creole phrase. But it hot and it greasy an' they doan know no better, so that jus' how it is. Place look like a Starbuck in a concentration camp. Got half way decent paper on a walls, but kids keep pickin' on it and pickin' on it. But what I know? Maybe that the 'weathered' look?
Little Chrissie chewin' on pancake. She say - Clients from the Pennsylvania Railroad, the big banks, the big hospitals... everybody... She was the top dominatrix in town........ Ricky goes - What do you mean 'was'? She's retired now, right?..... Little Chrissie goes - No, she ain't retired. Just not the top one anymore. She still workin'...... Ricky shoot her back a wide-eyed nod. But he do find it hard to believe...... And Little Chrissie say - Good thing we still got the cage. Almost sold it for scrap, you know. Iron worth money. And I know how to handle it. You know what Marty give us? Can't jus' put it in a bank, 'cause they gone say - Where you get all them Benjamins? But if you break it up, four thousand here, two thousand there, you can get 'way wit' it. Ten thousand no. Ten thousand too big. So we gone be hittin' lot a banks. Buy some stock too, 'cause bank don't pay you shit. God, now I wish Romney won. You know that? Cindy Lauper right. Money changes everything.
Speakin' a money, now they back at work. They at the bingo hall. They in the back. They countin' bills, makin' stacks. Kids like rotatin' back here, 'cause they not in all that cigarette stink. Ricky an' Little Chrissie at the table. Big Chrissie stand by desk. She talkin' a Marty. She do sex him up every now an' then, but that doan mean she like him. Don't hate him. Just doan care.
Marty say - Here. Jimmy leave this for you. He say you take this til he (eyes Ricky) get back....... Big Chrissie look at what he sliddin' on desk. It a envelope. It a big, fat envelope. She go - Oh, how much do it got?....... Marty say - I doan know. He not say....... Big Chrissie go - When he gettin' back?........ Marty go - I doan know. He not say.... Ricky look at Little Chrissie. She look at him..... Big Chrissie go - Humph....... Guess she all mixed up, 'cause Jimmy like a uncle to her. You know he like a play wit' ole Nazi antique shit wit' her granddad. Sometime it look like Hogan's Heroes down that basement. It like Satan's Toy Box. I tell you that.... Marty go - You know how funny Jimmy get. Nobody figure him out. I think he gotta see a couple guys in the old country. An' the less I know 'bout his bidniss in the old country, the better off I am. An' less you know, better off you are too...
So she jus' grab that envelope and stuff it down her pants........ Marty look at Ricky. You know he 'spects there a body somewhere? Ricky look back. But his face doan say nothin'. His face real good at keepin' quiet...... And that how it go. Muscles out front ticklin' up the ole ladies. Jimmy gone. Ukrainian kids not here no more. Life is good.
Now we back in the cellar. Little Chrissie grandma cellar. Ain't got no window. Could be day. Could be night. How he gonna know? Jimmy not know. Place only got one bulb. Everythin' yellow and dark and dim..... Jimmy start a wake up. He gettin' squirmy. Got one eye open. Start moanin'. Mus' pain him havin' boaf his arm chained up like that...... Marge (she the grandma) look in through them bars. She got on tight, black knee pants, like she doin' yogurt or somethin'. She got a sweat shirt what say - WORLD'S BEST GRANDMA, but I doan know if it true or not.....
Jimmy got boaf a his eyes open now. He look at her. She point to tray what on like a ole card table an' she say - I got borscht. Don't know if it 'sposed a be hot or cold. I got a big hunk a 'babkah' cake. I got some kind greasy salami. Doan know if it pork or squid or goat or what. Could be cock roach. How the hell am I 'sposed a know? An' I got some ice cold sour cream too. What you want? Take your pick.... Jimmy try to move his chained up arms. He go - Where am I?......... She go - I can't tell you.... He go - What this place is?..... She go - I can't tell you..... He go - What the hell are you?..... She go - I not gonna tell you.....
Jimmy start a scream and holler. He go - HELP! HELP! HELP!.... Marge doan say nothin, jus' reach in a pocket an' pull out pepper spray. She go over an' give him a little shot. He couch. He spit. He squint up boaf eyes real tight. He sputter...... She go - You like that?.... But he still wanna holler. So Marge hold up the pepper spray. She go - What I gotta do? Give you some more?..... That make him change his mind. He shut up and stay shut up til he catch his breath and start breathin' right....... Marge go - Hey, ole man, you hungry?....... Jimmy jus' nod....... Marge say - OK, I gone unlock them bars and come on in there. But I gone leave key out here on the table. So if you try an' get me wit' your legs or somethin'... like if you choke me wit' them thighs, you jus' be layin' there wit' a decomposin' ole lady on top a you.... You want that?....... Jimmy doan say nothin'. He jus' look.
So she unlock the door, take the tray and go in. It gone be like a lunch date.... almost...
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